Plum Jam… adulterated from All Recipes.
Luscious plums are in season so it’s time to make jam. You can make jam. It’s easy.
The best thing about this recipe is that you can leave the stones in until the jam is cooked and then you scoop them out at the end.
You need to feed 4 families, 10 footy players or 100 models over 5 years. Will make about 3 jars.
1.5 kg plums, washed and don’t worry about taking stones out
3 and 3/4 cups (1.5 kg) of sugar
2 or 3 cups of water. Tap is ok. Evian is not.
15 g unsalted butter
- Stay in your Chanel Pyjamas.
- Pull on Hermes socks.
- Tie up hair.
- Now wash the plums. Count how many there are. That way you know how many stones to fish out at the end.
- Toss the plums with pips and all in a large saucepan pan with 2 to 3 cups of water.
- Let the plums simmer for about an hour, or until the fruit is very soft and gooey and mushy.
- The liquid should have reduced down by about two-thirds.
- Now turn down the heat baby and add the sugar and stir until it has dissolved completely.
- Turn up the heat baby and toss in the little bit of butter and give it a stir until it has all melted.
- Bring the jam to a full rolling boil and boil rapidly for 15 minutes. Watch out it’s bloody hot and will splash out at you so don’t be wearing white.
- Relax and read the latest UK Vogue full of articles about body shape.
- It’s ready when the jam will cling to the back of the wooden spoon. You can boil it longer if you need to.
- Turn off the heat and grab a slotted spoon to remove the stones. You should have counted them before they turned to jam.
- Tip: Skim any icky froth from the top.
- Pour or spoon the jam into clean, warm jars.
- If you are a professional you should cover immediately with waxed paper discs and cellophane covers.
- If you are FiFi you just pour the jam into jars and let it cool for about ten minutes before you put the lid on. (I haven’t killed anyone yet).
- Eat with your own homemade Soda bread.
- Hint: George will love you forever after he tastes this.
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