“ Plastic surgery is my life. I just gave my parrot a beak job” Joan Rivers
“The next product I’m going to put my name on is extra-small condoms. I can never find extra-small condoms and I know it’s really embarrassing for people.”. Enrique Iglesias (anyone for tennis then?) He needs a beak job.
“She looked amazing. I watched with my mouth open all the way through her performance. She’s an absolute legend and she makes us all look like amateurs. I can’t believe she’s 89 and looks like that.” Robbie Williams on Madonna at the MTV awards (more than just a beak job)
“ You can’t trust the internet. Someone told me there was this website with my head on other people’s naked bodies doing lewd, crude, and totally unacceptable things. But the real drag of it was that my body is much better than their bodies… My God, at least do me justice.” Nicolette Sheriden pretends it was not her doing lewd, crude, unacceptable things on the internet.
“It makes sex better, believe me, the first time I did it, the technician did half, and I was like ‘Stop!’ She said, ‘Sit down, I have to finish.’ But then it gets easier. The more you do it, the less hair grows back. But yeah, I love it. I swear by it. Every woman should try a Brazilian wax once. “ Eva Longoria enough of your lewd crude unacceptable details (obviously not sleeping with Enrique).
” When the [bleepers] try and hem you in with Bond, it’s great to come back with ‘The Matador.’ It’s great to say, ‘[Bleep] you, [bleephole]. [Bleep] you who wouldn’t give me a job. [Bleep] you who thought I was some wuss. [Bleep] you, who thought I was a pretty boy. [Bleep] you, who thought anything of me without even knowing me or giving me the chance. [Bleep] you.” Pierce Brosnan on why he was dropped as James Bond ( bleeping incoherent).
“What relationship? Are you sure? I don’t know about that. That is news to me. Oh God! Are there pictures of them together? Are you kidding? “ Paris Hilton’s mum on finding out what her daughters been doing with Stavros Niarchos ( Subscribe to The FiFi Report Kathy Hilton!)
“ this is the dumbest decision I’ve ever made in my life - it went like this: If a man really loves me, he will not have to love me for my body. He will really love me just for me” Kirstie Alley on choosing bleeping boyfriends. (Paris Hilton’s boyfriends are never like that).
“ I don’t know why gays love me because I hate them. Who are you people and do your mothers know what you do!?! I am all for gay marriage, though. Why should only straights suffer the misery of divorce” Joan Rivers…
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