Everything You Need to Know About London Fashion Week in an Hilarious Handy Quiz Form… from Lynn Yaeger at The Cut
Q. What eminent designer puts what seems like 150 looks on the runway - bottom-grabbing pencil skirts; tiny purple Floradora dresses - and forbids photography (apparently to lend an air of exclusivity, but in this case, maybe to protect his reputation) and emerges on the runway at the end of the show, then stands around with a bunny-in-the-headlights look in his eyes, waiting for a standing ovation that never comes?
A. Tom Ford.
Q. What unlikely celeb occupies the front row at Vivienne Westwood, a show where we are handed a manifesto on Gaia and global warming, and treated to models made-up like crazy wood nymphs, including an upper-ear sprayed gold?
A. Pam Anderson (with lobe unmolested.)
Q. What horrible trend spotted at Burberry and Tom Ford is intended to make you look like a literal basket case?
A. Scratchy, nasty raffia. This substance should return to the earth and be left to biodegrade in peace.
Q. What new designer for an old house at least partially acknowledged that brand’s iconic roots by showing a group of endearingly old-fashioned twin sets? (Look under the planks at a lot of the London collections and you will find a deep river of dowdiness running free.)
A. Pringle of Scotland, with Tilda Swinton, gracing the front row, haughty and adorable in (one assumes) a Pringle pullover.
Q. What house ends its show with a shower of coppery confetti shaped like coins, perhaps to signify our increasingly worthless currency?
A. Burberry, where the palette is drab and some garments are decorated with faux-ethnic wooden beads.
Q. Who is responsible for the otherwise charming bubble-skirted flower frock that flips up so high you can see the model’s G-string, an event that makes certain front row denizens want to call out “free show!” as if we are still in junior high school?
A. Mary Katrantzou, who was digitizing flower prints long before other designers jumped on the horticultural-sartorial bandwagon.