The FiFi Report 096

The Miracle Of Bern by Director: Sönke Wortmann (German with subtitles)
The Plot: Grumpy old Man returns home to his family in Germany 10 years after the being a POW in WW2 to find he had a son he never knew about (who is obsessed with soccer) and a teenager who is into naughty things like rock n roll and Jazz. But hey! Don’t let the idea of a film in German about football set in unglamourous postwar Germany put you off. It’s a very sweet story revolving around the world championship soccer match and lets face it, who would know anything about that?
Who: Never mind, you will never have heard of them anyway.
Acting: Excellent. The young boy is the cutest, sweetest thing. Bless.
Interiors: The sets are amazing; the furniture from the 50’s looks so cool.
Designer inspiration: Shot in the old fashioned colours of a 1950’s postcard, it’s awfully lovely to look at and so very Marni Spring summer 04.
Blood’n’ guts: No blood but ouch! The grumpy old man gives a real belting (and it’s not a Gucci one either).
Car chases: With all the testosterone flying around in the soccer match it’s amazing there isn’t one car chase (but cars didn’t go fast enough in post war Germany).
Smooches: it’s a soccer movie…
Best line: ‘Women and soccer don’t mix’
Waterproof mascara? I’m recommending the Chanel one, it should deal very well with the cute ending and the wet eyes.
Best review: ’ I’m giving it 4”. David Stratton
Tom Cruise/Alien sighting? No, but the grumpy old man could do with some Prozac, sorry vitamins, to get over his depression.
Botox: Could have done with an injection of something to give to the baby crying next to us in the cinema (Oh my god! it’s true).
When Harry met Sally romance Richter scale: This movie gets a rating on the schmaltz-o-meter (it’s a German word after all).
See it or donate to the Prada bag/save Katie fund? This film is as soft, sweet and retro as a rose print Prada dress; you’ll feel so feminine watching all the macho boys playing Soccer you’ll forget that black is back for at least 2 hours. Hint: the name of the movie spoils what happens in the end…