The FiFi Report 247
12 March 2009
Chic Hosiery

Reasons to stop applying Fake tan on your legs:

• Your hands are so brown people think you are wearing gloves.
• You are beginning to look like a block of Cadbury Top Deck
• You are asked if you are related to Obama
• You can now cover your legs with the chic new hosiery. Black is the colour - of course- but this season you can have a little fun. Feeling funky? Go for the shredded look a la Rodarte. Otherwise try pretty lace, mesh, fishnets, or shiny black.

$19 , ,

Issue 247

More hilarious quotes from the Fashion Flock….)

  • “Bet they’re made from potatoes and mashed up cauliflower,” Rachel Zoe’s assistant Brad about the full leg faux-leather boots boots at the Stella McCartney Show (who refuses to sell leather).
  • “I know it sounds like I’m a pushy fashion person right now, but I really want to get in the show but I’m more concerned that all these people think I’m a hooker. Who else would wear these boots at 10 a.m.?” A Buyer waiting to get into a show In Paris
  • “It’s only slightly less dangerous than covering wars. In Milan, it was about the same as covering Vietnam.” - Morley Safer, the 60 minutes correspondent reporting on his first encounter with Fashion Week
  • “Fashion may be frivolous and superficial and often cruel.” Beth Ditto saying when she met Karl he uttered a lot of “fat-phobic” remarks. It’s War.
  • “Get me someone from the press office please. Are we just supposed to wait here in the rain? Karl would be furious if he knew about this.” Fashion writer Hilary Alexander at the Lagerfeld show that was scheduled for 10:00 am. Doors started to open at 10:49 am. It was cold and it was raining. Cruel.
  • “Do you really think an umbrella goes with this outfit?” one English fashion editor asked.
  • “It was all highly wearable, if a bit like a Mary Poppins spoonful of medicine. I want to mull it over a bit” . By Cathy Horyn blogging about the YSL show
  • “I’ve gone Chic” Kate Moss at the Chanel Show
  • “You’re so beautiful and charming. You should play Coco Chanel!” Suzy Menkes to Freida Pinto ( Star of Slumdog)
  • “Thank you so much! But I’m not sure if they ever would want an Indian Coco” Freida Pinto replies.
  • “Now I want those shoes even more.” – Overheard from the Front Row at Herve Leger show where several models took a tumble on the perilously high snakeskin stilettos
  • “We’re trying to keep it beachy but not too homeless-looking.” Stylist Dennis Lanni, on the hair at Lacoste
  • “It’s not fashion week without me.” Kanye West
  • “Who is he?” Asks Vivienne Westwood to a friend when Kanye ran over to tell her he is a big fan
  • “I think he’s famous in America,” the friend said.
Thigh high boots

What: Over the Knee Boots
Which: It’s the HOT trend straight off the runways from Fashion Week. Don’t make that face: Of course you don’t have to wear them. You just need to know they are THE major trend. You want boots that go over the knee and right the leg. In black, brown, cream or tan. They can be gladiator style, waders or just plain and simple.
Why: Because they are fabulous. Because they were in just about every show from New York to Paris and Milan in between. Because they work so well with all those short skirts. Because they look new and sexy. Because maybe there is a subliminal message about the World Economic Downturn: Get on the Armour and Cover up! Because George Clooney will love them.
Wear: With short skirts, dresses, jackets, long cardigans. With skinny legs. (not sure where you can buy them)
Where: Check out the slideshow of all the amazing boots at and read what US Vogue Editor Lauren Santo Domingo had to do to make her own Boots …what a girl!

Bobbi Brown Pot Rouge

The problem when spend your days shopping and writing about shopping? You don’t see sunlight. Your skin is pale and wan. It gets worse: The colour drains from your face when you are confronted with the sad fact: You can  not possibly squish anything else on the Black Amex. Shopping can be cruel sometimes. Which is why I adore the fabulous Bobbi Brown Pot Rouge. Little pots of creamy blush that you can easily apply in the mirror in the car racing to the shops. And it stays on. For hours. I am addicted. Suddenly you look healthy. Alive. Vibrant. Full of vitality. Which is more than you can say about your bank account.

$58 Bobbi Brown Pot Rouge From David Jones, Myer and .

Issue 247

  • Mazes! Models! Moss! The scene from ’s star-studded front row…”Grandiose, magical, and unforgettable!” says Kate Moss
  • Is on the cover of US Harper’s Bazaar
  • How do you predict global good taste in a time of economic downturn? LVMH CEO Bernard Arnault is quietly confident . A must read in for anyone interested in the richest man in France, and one of the most powerful in fashion
  • Sex, Lies and Photoshop! A Fascinating from the experts on retouching
  • See the from CNN following French Vogue Editor Carine Roitfeld during fashion week (with snippets from with Karl Lagerfeld, Hedi Slimane, Marc Jacobs, and Mario Testino, and a shoot where Carine directs with Patrick Demarchelier.)
  • The New Yorker’s biannual Style Issue hits newsstands this week with — what else? — a Michelle Obama cover. Then read about the diffident New York Times society photographer . and his willfully ascetic lifestyle, including living in a former artist’s studio “without a private bathroom or cooking facilities,” and sleeping on “a piece of foam, a wooden board and several milk crates.” reports WWD
  • Check out the for Coco Avant Chanel, a film of Gabrielle ‘Coco’ Chanel’s early life, played by the divine Audrey Tautou. In French!
  • Read a fabulous interview with Lanvin’s Alber Elbaz in this week (Asked what he imagines life would be like if he were thin, he replied, “Amazing,” with real conviction.”)
  • Dree Hemingway is the new It girl and “the next new name on everyone’s lips. (her great-grandpa is Ernest, mom is Mariel)—Check her out at and her starring role in the
  • Cathy Horyn , the fashion writer at The New York Times, blogs about “I love waking up on a sunny Paris morning knowing that my plan for the day includes a manicure.” .Me too
  • “Where in the world is Martin Margiela? Judging from the house’s fall collection, the designer has finally left the building” says
  • The fashion flock is Twittering ( see last week’s FiFi Report) all over the runways…read the amusing snippets posted from the FROW ( Front Row)…..
  • Fashion crowd is getting cranky, grumbling loudly about the eight-day Paris runway season…
  • Snow is stinging my eyes at Galliano! What the heck is this stuff made of?
  • Bubbles and babushkas on the John Galliano runway. But did he count on giving his packed front row a collective asthma attack! 
  • Hermes: Tatiana Patitz almost trips and falls 3x! Painful to watch. Someone pls take this girl to a safe place where she can’t hurt herself?
  • Kate Moss in a fit of giggles amid the frenzy that met her arrival at Chanel’s show, literally wiping tears from her eyes.
  • It’s Pamela Anderson at the Vivienne Westwood show…
www.fifi.com.au


It’s Shoe Heaven! Christian Louboutin’s new site is fabulous: butterflies, magicians and total madness. You will adore playing with 360 degree view of divine shoes, bags and reading about the life and times of the great M. Louboutin! chic.


Welcome to the Brave new World of Fashion Targets Breast Cancer! Akira, Willow, Sass  and Bide, Easton Pearson, Colette Dinnigan and Ksubi have all donated fabulous clothes to raise money for breast cancer research…. A Fabulous cause!

Issue 247

  • John Mayer has dumped Jennifer Aniston again. ( He’s just not that into you)
  • Kate Moss and Lily Allen are BEST Friends heading to the Chanel show.
  • ‘Britney Spears is back and this time she’s packing some serious music into her 23rd comeback in the last 6 years. “Britney is amazing. She just ate 4 burritos, 6 pepperoni pizzas, 24 bars of candy, a bucket full of cheetos and a barrel of aspartame cola — and she can still come out on stage and do the moves. I don’t think even Barry White in his heyday could do that,” Britney’s personal fitness coach said. Although still clinically insane, Britney is kept in check by a team of attendants who follow her everywhere’…saystheDaily squib
  • Katie Holmes suddenly has long hair. On her head.
  • Barbie is 50 and I couldn’t care less.
  • Paris Hilton has been seen with another random dude.
  • Madonna and her younger beau Jesus Luz played dress-up Monday night. She was a school girl. He is a school boy.
  • LiLo has launched her own fake tan – Who would buy that after all her tanning disasters?
  • It’s official: There is a recession. FemBot Vicky B recycled an old outfit… Thank god she also had new Birkin handbag
  • Geri Halliwell broke off her engagement to Italian tycoon. What? so soon?
  • Doctors have attacked chefs Nigella Lawson and Rick Stein for fatty recipes that ‘add to obesity crisis’. Send them to fashion week.
  • The first images of the US version of Absolutely Fabulous are out.  Kristen Johnson, whom you might remember as the girl that proclaims New York o-v-e-r before falling to her death in a later SATC episode, is set to play Patsy, while Kathryn Hahn, who recently starred as Kate Winslet’s neighbor in Revolutionary Road, plays Eddie…reports Thecut.
The Christmas List
Another Fashion Book…..by Jefferson Hack

The Christmas List
Another Fashion Book…..by Jefferson Hack

The Christmas List
Another Fashion Book…..by Jefferson Hack
‘Another Magazine, one of the most influential and groundbreaking magazines in the world today, presents the first in a series of collectable books.
For the first time, Another Fashion Book brings together in one volume extensive work by the most iconic names in fashion and art photography including Craig McDean, Nick Knight, Mario Sorrenti, Inez & Vinoodh, Sam Taylor-Wood, Horst Diekgerdes, Stephen Shore, David Sims, Terry Richardson, Steven Klein, Willy Vanderperre and Glen Luchford. Often blurring the boundary between art and fashion, the images are a distinct record of photographic innovation during the start of this century. Through a highly-considered commissioning process, Another Magazine and its community of photographers and stylists bridged the gap between the European and American style-divide of the 90s, to evolve a new international fashion language that has in many ways come to define the look of this decade.’ cool
UK £45.00 Steidl Books or  Edition 7L Publication date: May 2009

Issue 247

Why not start this fashion report with a word straight from the shows in Paris?  Filipa Fino, US Vogue’s Senior Accessories Editor, opens her Paris notebook. ” Had a great visit to the Christian Louboutin showroom where I saw the most fantastic studded velvet slipper shoes (for immediate gratification go to Stubbs and Wootten, where you can personalize your own pair)…. Fashion Trend of the Moment: shoulder pads. Every chic fashionista is sporting some kind of padded-shoulder jacket: Candy Pratts Price’s is knit; Lauren Santo Domingo’s is like a blouse; Vanessa Traina’s is leather…. Loving: A new model named Irina. Spotted her at the Palais Royale on a little shopping escapade. She was so chic and casual in her black skinny jeans and Clarks desert boots: makes me want to run to the Clarks store now—if it weren’t for the four-inch heels I am in…. The Must-Have bag: The new Nina Ricci bag is on the shoulders of…pretty much everyone! One editor transports her gorgeous crocodile version inside her Balenciaga tote to protect it from the Paris drizzle. “ Now, that is traveling in style…Now you know what to buy…

Economy Class:
:
Looking great here with alot of new sharp pieces:
You want:

  • The amazing black leather, rock chick skinny pants: oooh la la…So cool. So Balmania. Wear them with your tweed blazer with serious shoulder pads and serious monster shoes. Wear them if you think you can actually squeeze into them. $599. Not cheap but since we are at the beginning of the black leg over the knee boot/pant trend you will get seasons of wear and lots of bite for the bucks.
  • Love the floral 40’s chiffon frock with a tiny blossom print in burgundy, brown and blue. It has ¾ sleeves and little covered buttons. You know a floral vintage dress is one of the key pieces for winter. It’s not really BoHo but more about a 70’s vibe. You want to wear this with a leather jacket, or a fur jacket, black opaques, and your favourite stomp-a-licious heels. Best news? The dress is now reduced to $199
  • There are a couple of cool black leather biker jackets here: One has a low square almost plunging neckline and brass zip detail and the leather is nice but it is $699. I didn’t try it on. It’s very “fashion”….
  • Check out the simple easy to wear round neck, grey, sleeveless, sweater dress $149. it has it’s own belt too. This is a good one to wear right now and then later into winter. Ditch the belt and throw on your own Alaia one.
  • Oh, I do love the black shiny leggings if I could only wear them …..they will work in winter with a longer jacket that can hide drooping bits or floppy bottoms. $39
  • Buy the cuffed, semi floppy, harem pants if you have not bought any yet. You know you need to. NEED to. The harem pants are cool, ageless, for anyone. They are THE pant of the season. Just make sure you wear something chic, grownup and tailored so you don’t look like I Dream of Genie. It looks like these ones do not have the low crutch situation which means they do good things: skim over the thighs and give you a waist. They have side pockets and a small little non descript buckle on the hem $149.
  • You want the dark denim parachute pants: How cool. Ditto when wearing these….Dress up that denim with a serious structured jacket, shoulder pads, heels, and amazing necklace. You could throw this back with a little sequin Tank. And heels. You know you HAVE to wear heels. The higher the better. The Paris/Milan runways were full of humongously high heels. SO high you need an oxygen mask. (My tip for the recession? Become a podiatrist! You will be raking in millions about 5 years time: Then you can buy Prada shoes for the rest of your life) $99
  • Buy the soft cream/silver shiny plastic zip up ‘Chintz’bomber jacket. $169. This is chic. It’s a casual, soft, easy, floppy jacket that says I want to go out on weekends with jeans and skinny pants. Or it will be happy to go to work with you and your pencil skirt. Remember mix it up: a Floppy jacket needs a narrow skirt or pants. Floppy pants need a fitted sharp jacket.
  • Love the stone leather Chanel style short square, panelled jacket: it has a cut off round collar with a cute little ruffle at the neck line $699. If you can’t do the biker/bomber jacket then go for a more chic de la chic look. It will work equally well with jeans or a pretty dress. It will love going out,  it will love a gin and tonic too. Hic.

;
Head here for cheap but chic pieces ( TIP: you don’t have to be 15)
Best buys are:

  • The amazing black sequin leggings (OK: You do have to be kind of young to wear these.).$89. These are cool worn with a cropped jacket and your YSL short boots. Bless anyone who can wear these.
  • For a more classic look check out the V neck purple, black, or grey long knit cardigans with front pockets. You could wear this with the black sequin leggings and a white Tee $69
  • Everyone needs grey dark denim jeans $99. Everyone. So shut up and go and buy some….
  • Buy the amazing black leather military jacket…so Balmania. $299. Cool
  • Checkout the silk bomber jacket $149 ..So Balenciaga or was it Gucci?
  • The black leather sleeveless vest with epaulettes and brass buttons and a fold over front: It’s very rock chic ; love it with a pretty skirt or over a floral dress. $199
  • Love the silver lurex stretchy belt $29. Also in bronze.

:
You will be surprised how much more fashion it is here: I even see peg leg pants and jumpsuits….what the? fabulous!
Best buys are:

  • Love the purple velvet blazer; so chic. Yes, you can wear purple if you tone it down with more chic colours $$
  • You want the shag-a-delic furry waistcoat $149…but it’s in white and I fear I may look like sheep.. I want BLACK….
  • Oh I see a short double breasted, belted cotton stone trench with tortoiseshell buttons and epaulettes $169….wear it undone over Everything you own. Even your PJ’s.
  • You want the high waist 70’s wide leg jeans in dark denim and no obvious coloured stitching with a seam at the front $99. Cool. Watch the high waist suck in the muffin top. Bingo. Put down that almond croissant: it doesn’t mean you eat.
  • There is a chic grey knit cape (or wrap?) kind of loose cardigan with a few tasssles: it’s short and cropped. Wear when you are relaxing and drying out in rehab ( when you still need to look effortlessly chic ) $99
  • The hippy multi print  dress in burgundy, blues and browns and yellow is a great buy. Love this with big platforms and gladiator heels. You need to toughen it up or you will look last season. Oh God. Anything but that….$159.

Business Class:
:  I LOVE this store: Minimalist, architectural, fabulous fabrics and understated strong chic;
You want:

  • The cotton drape cap sleeve grey or black straight dress: it’ still the season of the dress (but trousers are the new hot look). You can throw this on and it will keep its shape; None of that frou frou floppy look here. $499
  • Love the black sweater with a cross over front and cap sleeves that stick out wide over the shoulders. You know shoulders are the new IT Zone: so anything with shoulder pads or big puff sleeves are De rigueur. $279
  • Adore the navy minimalist jacket in wool with a round neck , almost a short bomber with side slit pockets and hidden buttons $699. Put it in and feel a million bucks. The quality is fabulous and you will love this because it’s got I am not trying too hard feel to it. A certain Insouciance. Mai oui
  • The grey round knit tank $99 is quite the piece for every wardrobe. Wear a la YSL under a navy sleeveless jacket and high waist peg pants. Don’t frown. (Botox is getting trop cher). You will wear peg pants. You will.
  • The straight architectural sleeveless black or navy sheath dress is fabulous. It has a drape detail that hangs from the shoulders at the back . Wear now with bare legs and then straight into winter under a shrunken boyfriend jacket $499. Divine.
  • You will die – I die thank you Rachel Zoe - over the black wool peacoat with a kind of cape detail on the sleeves $$. This is a fabulous buy because the sharp cut gives you a shape: you can trick people you have a great figure. It will work equally well with your jeans or with skinny black pants or a dress.
  • You must have the wide, cuffed black pants: so chic. These will be the core of your wardrobe. Wear with converse or will heels. Keep the top fitted so you don’t do an impersonation of Fatty Arbuckle.
  • Buy up the BEST simple cotton long sleeve grey , navy, black or white classic tee $89! Yes please.
  • By the way the knit wear and the tops are now 25% off….

:
The shoes and bags are getting better and better. And we LOVE the jewellery…
Best buys are:

  • The black lace up boots with feathers along the top are fabulous. Only for the serious fashion types who love a bit of Theatre. And why not have fun with your feet? You can buy now and wear when it’s cold with your black opaques. These outrageous little shoe boots will add vava voom to all your sad, bored, tragic clothes snoring in the bottom of your wardrobe. $699.
  • Checkout all the chic shoulder bags, some for evening and some for just being fabulous : Buy the silver chain mail evening bag in bronze or gunmetal, gorgeous with a chain strap and a floppy shape $299
  • Adore the snakeskin shoulder bag in patchwork with silver hardware. $399
  • In the jewellery you want the silver multi chain “ice maiden choker”. It has a big disc and many chains and is quite dramatic $299. You know that the statement necklace is the most important accessories of the season? You do?. Maybe you just forgot. …Think Marc Jacobs, Burberry, Lanvin and Louis Vuitton…Stack it all on ( and keep the rest simple: your name is not Lou Lou de la Falaise. Sorry.)
  • Love the multi silver and pearl strand short necklaces $449… it’s a serious and dramatic piece but I love it with a white Tee and jeans and chic jacket. Give the necklace a canvas to work on so all the attention goes to the necklace ( and not your fat thighs and last seasons jeans)
  • How can I resist the choker actually called Vava Voom? Very Elsa Peretti inspired it has drop chain mail tassels and Swarovski crystals and black jet. $159.
  • Also keep any eye out here for the fabulous jewelled cuffs $169, the silver studded bangles $39 and the wide chunky faceted bangles $149. Stack up the bangles. It’s a great look for summer when your arms are bare….

:
I see a lot more fashion pieces here: still classic with more of an edge.
Standout pieces are:

  • The fabulous print ( very Marni esque) dress. It’s sleeveless silk with a black and white painterly check in black and white on the top and then a red and white check on the skirt $299. it’s called the Sabrina dress. The dress - and especially the print dress- are still hanging in there for another season. You will get seasons of wear. And anyway I love anything that is trans-seasonal. Wear this now and later with your favourite monster heels and black opaques….and later when it’s really cold with a fake fur chubby jacket. There is also a skirt version of the skirt $179
  • Checkout the leather bomber jacket $499 with a zip. The other leather jacket which I prefer has a hidden zip and is more understated. After all you don’t want to look like you’re in the Village people singing YMCA $499. Do I have to tell you how to wear a biker jacket? No! Surely you know by now?… (If you don’t be thankful you have subscribed to The FiFi Report. Keep reading. The crazy psychology of fashion will be explained. Your days as a dag are over.)
  • You want a classic long line red fine knit cardigan with brass buttons and cute little epaulettes. These give it an edge and make it a little more fashion so you don’t look like Doris Day or straight from the set of Mad Men. The epaulettes sex it up. $139. Wear over a white tee and a full skirt. Please don’t do up all the buttons. The idea is just to do one or two at the waist. Unless you are a school Marm or a NUN. Bless
  • Have I seen a trench I don’t love? Buy the one here that is single breasted in cotton. And yes, it’s black $379
  • You want a flippy skirt this season. They look so right with a tight jacket flirting and swirling out ( it’s that fit n flare silhouette). Love the dark grey knit flippy skirt which has flat front -very flattering- and then flips out into a full skirt. Very Alaia in a way. If you know Alaia. $199
  • Love the belts here ; you want the black patent one with a big resin clasp…$99

First Class:


Shoes, and bag Heaven.
You also want the clothes: Best buys include:

  • The Divine furry shag-a-delic caramel or in blue waist coat $1200
  • The navy loose wrap cardigan $$, Snuggle into this on the pointy end of the plane
  • The navy coat dress with buttons down the front in wool jersey: it’s collarless with patch pockets $1500 ,
  • The navy trench with no obvious buttons, belted,  it’s rather fabulous $1400
  • The print floral paisly print dress with a drawstring waist and poets sleeves $$ is the epitome of Chic Boho. Wear with boots.
  • The purple paisley silk blouse is perfect for jeans and chinos $1100
  • The black leather biker jacket with brass zip is gorgeous. YOU NEED it $$
  • Can we talk about the quilted ruched shoulder bags? Divine about $1400
  • Adore the python platform sling back heels $$….Gorgeous.

Hot off the runways of Paris…

Louis Vuitton Fall 2009 Ready to Wear ( )
“Marc Jacobs ended the season at Louis Vuitton in Paris as he began it with his own show in New York: with the eighties. Different city, different accent, though, and this slice of the late eighties—ruffled, ruched, and poufed as it was—looked as if Jacobs had pulled out his 1987 magazines and worked up a playful homage to Christian Lacroix. He didn’t quite put it that way backstage, however. Jacobs said that, partly in preparation for the Model as Muse exhibition at the Met and his role as honorary chair of the opening gala, he was thinking of “all those great French muses of the late eighties.” Specifically, he cited Marie Seznec (who modeled for Lacroix), Victoire de Castellane (who worked for Chanel), and Inès de la Fressange (who was virtually French fashion mascot in chief at the time). Looking back on those days of chichi fashion extremes brought out a lot of jeune Parisienne frivolity in the clothes, if not the staging, which was done, pseudo-salon style, without a runway (albeit in a large transparent tent parked, as usual, in a courtyard of the Louvre). The chance of a close inspection revealed lots of puffy peplum jackets, tons of shirring and ruching (in print or leather), bubble skirts, bejeweled satin leggings, and a mini lace Marie Antoinette pannier dress with a saucy sheer balconette. Jacobs’ take on big shoulders ran from grosgrain bow-smothered balloon puffs to the widest short coats (in camel or red) on any runway—almost as broad as they were long. It was also a rich accessory fest for the leather goods company. Leather necklaces and belts came fashioned like paper chains, and thigh boots were topped with ruffles and balanced on pearl and glitter-covered heels. The all-important bags had also acquired eighties pie-crust frills and gilded monograms. If it wasn’t quite the fashion tour de force of Vuitton’s Spring collection, this penultimate show of an often dour and cautious season read as a welcome interlude of cheerful, flirty confidence in a post-crash depression. ”

MIU MIU Fall 2009 Ready to Wear ( Review from )
“Miuccia Prada wrapped up fashion month with a compelling Miu Miu collection that, like more than a few others this season, felt quintessentially Parisian. With bits and pieces from Histoire d’O, Visconti’s Conversation Piece, and Fassbinder and Antonioni films on the soundtrack, it tried to answer the question, “What’s the bourgeoisie now?” Or so the designer explained backstage, adding, “they were different kinds of femmes fatales.” The opening coat-dresses, most of them sleeveless, were worn half unbuttoned, exposing flesh-toned brassieres. Either that, or the dresses were draped in back, revealing bare expanses of skin a-shimmer from light dustings of iridescent glitter. A strategically draped long scarf edged in fur, meanwhile, might stand in for a missing shirt. Prada sent out coats and dresses made from what could’ve been upholstery fabric salvaged from the tony Avenue Foch manse where the show was held, then moved on to looks that paired filmy silk blouses with long, narrow skirts (the most striking combination came in turquoise and ruby). Toward the end, she put aside the underwear fetish that was a through line with her signature collection (in Milan it was red briefs) to show sleeveless shells and skirts in silk crepe embroidered with large, colorful gems. The nude bras, furry heels, and paillette-covered kneesocks gave the vaguely seventies-feeling clothes an erotic subtext. But sexually charged undercurrents aside, what this Miu Miu outing boiled down to was a collection of great-looking, salable coats.”

Free Form Peach Tart…..adulterated from Donna Hay

A divine little summer tart. Easy to throw together and even easier to gulp down.

You need for about 4 fatties or 10 slimming dieters or 20 models

2 squares of ready made short crust or puff pastry ( or about 280grams of ready made pastry you can roll out)
½ cup raw almonds
2 tabs plain flour
¼ cup caster sugar
40 g of unsalted butter
½ teas vanilla extract
2 or 3 peaches, nectarines, plums, apricots, pears or figs…Use any fruit you love
Icing sugar for accessorizing

• Preheat oven to 180°C.
• Throw on a cute apron over your Eres bikini
• Gulp down a watermelon daiquiri
• Find the almonds and toss in the whizzer; you want to ground them so they are still a little chunky. Think Beyonce’s booty and you got it
• Moisterise a cake tin with lashing of extremely fattening yet oh so delicious butter
• Cut up the peaches/figs or plums into slices as thin as Ashley Olsen
• Toss the butter in a saucepan and gently melt. If only you could do that to with your booty
• Now find a bowl and throw in the almonds, butter, flour and sugar and the vanilla extract
• Grab the one square of the pastry and spread it half way across and up the side of the cake tin.
• Do the same with the other square and join it up. You might need to cut it and paste a bit so that it looks pretty .
• Leave the sides long because you are going to fold them over the tart.
• Now spread the almond mix over the pastry
• Then top with the slices of the peaches
• Fold the sides of the pastry over the fruit leaving half of the tart exposed.
• Sprinkle with more caster sugar. Just so to make sure there are serious calories here
• Throw in the oven and bake for 30 to 35 minutes or until golden as Valentino’s tan.
• Sprinkle with icing sugar
• Serve hot or cold and accessorise with dollops of outrageously fabulous cream
• Sensationale!

Login / Subscribe

Favourite Finds
Beyonce queen B!
Beyonce is on the cover
coach
Legacy leather penny Shoulder bag $298 from
Balenciaga
Red leather trainer $359 from Balenciaga from
Diva
Blue Cuff With Clasp $19.99 from
Wittner
Princer White leather $169.95 from
Bassike
lo slung jean 30 year no holes $340 from
Elsa Peretti®
Mesh bracelet AU$1,350 from
Cotton On
Laser cut suede touch tunic $39 from
3.1 Phillip Lim
Pashli Satchel $918 from
Witchery
Seam Detail Leather Tee $199 from
DIAVOLINA
DIAVOLINA orange patent pointy heels 4139 from
Tree of Life
Peace Symbol Loose Fit T-shirt $29.95 from
Sportsgirl
Baroque necklace $29.95 from
Country Road
Stretch Pant $79.95 from
Sportscraft
Sylvie Boot Skirt $119 from
Seed Heritage
Tabatha toe sandal $99 from
sass and bide
THE 3RD PERSON boyfriend jean $270 from .
Sambag
Belinda Grey Plain Leather  ballet flats from $175 from
Trenery
leather Shoulder bag with detachable strap $189 from
3.1 Philip Lim
Leather Sweatpants $ 1,358 from
3.1 Phillip Lim
Grey Ribbed Funnel Neck Shrug ( backless!) AU$397 from
Mimco
ABSTRACT CUBIST CHOKER  $299 from
Nine West
Lookglobal heels $139 from
Karl By Karl Lagerfeld
Amber crystal and bead-embellished cotton collar £116 from
Marcs
STRIPE BRETON 1/2 SLEEVE TEE $69 from
Jac and jack
Don Sweater $299 100% Cashmere from
Karen Walker
Soul Club - Fluro Orange $220 from
J Crew
Bouclé peplum jacket AUD $204 from.
Hermes
Bracelet in Casaque Red Epsom calfskin AU$700 from .
Isabel Marant
ÉTOILE ISABEL MARANT grey top US$365 from
French Connection
METAL SNAKE DRESS $249 from .
Cue
Drop Earring blends Swarovski and glass stones$70 from
Country Road
Print Sateen Pant $129 from .
Burberry
Peplum waist leather jacket $2,895.00 from.
Country Road
Fluro Scarf $49.95 from
Bassike
Blue boxy fit t.shirt with v neck $90 from
Bardot
White cotton Peplum top from $79.95
Video Report

Coming Soon!

23 August 2012

You have a $1000: what do you spend it on?

View Results

Loading ... Loading ...
Close

Login / Subscribe

The FiFi Report is a witty, weekly, online fix of fabulous fashion, hot finds, outrageous gossip & all things groovy!





or

> Forgot password?

By subscribing to FiFi you agree FiFi may send you newsletters from time to time. Privacy Policy