The FiFi Report 186
19 October 2007
Issue 186
  • "The widening of my life, and my hips, is really just the true gift of my husband Danny (Moder)" Julia Roberts
  • “I love having everything documented. It shows people what everyday life is like for me, how hard I work. There are a lot of misconceptions about me." Paris Hilton commenting on the filming of her trip to Africa….Misconceptions that she has a brain.
  • "Before my life was about having fun, going to parties - it was a fantasy. But when I had time to reflect, I felt empty inside. I want to leave a mark on the world." Paris Hilton is now widening her life to make a fantasy video in Africa
  • "I think the reason I never ended up in as much trouble as Paris or Lindsay seem to is that I’m not stupid, so I’d never do a lot of the things those girls do, and I’ve always had good friends around me.. You’ll never read a story about me going out and partying when I’m supposed to be working. Nor would I show up on a set drunk or miss a day’s work - never." Tara Reid is just stupid drunk the rest of the time (pictured left).
  • "I’m stupid, I’m sorry… I’m a horrible driver." Britney (at least she knows)
  • "Now we have people literally from sex tapes getting together, I’m assuming, to make the world’s greatest sex tape." Jon Stewart, commenting on the marriage between Pam Anderson and Rick Solomon
  • “Getting married is the most fun you can have in life. Being married sucks." Pamela Anderson on her latest marriage. Sucks.
  • “ I’d like to thank everybody who got naked regardless of what their agents, lawyers and managers might have thought," Robert Duffy to a crowd of doctors on the Marc Jacobs on raising money for melanoma research with a line of T-shirts featuring the likes of Eva Mendes and Winona Ryder in deshabille. The tee’s are $20 US each (Naomi Campbell’s tee is pictured left).
  • “In between kissing we would exchange diet tips and Robbie kept asking me how I stayed so thin” Suzanne Coppin, some blonde chick who’d had a fling with Robbie Williams. The widening of her legs?
  • "There is nothing bad about it. The morning sickness and the vomiting and the hot sweats” Halle Berry is looking forward to the widening of everything. Bless

Customised Haviana Thongs

I don’t actually wear them but they are cool. They are comfortable. They are practical. They say Aussie summer. They are thongs. Now you can customise your own Haviana’s at General Pants. Choose your own colours and straps and some cute little dingle dangles bits to decorate them. It’s a way to personalise your look and make your style your own. Why don’t I wear them? My feet are permanently stuck in high heel tippy toes. Walking in flats is far too uncomfortable.

$30 Customised Haviana Thongs from selected General Pants stores nationally.

Ways to update your wardrobe

Ways to update your wardrobe:

  • Sob and scream I have nothing to wear to your rich father
  • Sob and scream I have nothing to wear to your rich boyfriend
  • Sob and scream I have nothing to wear to the bank
  • Don’t eat for a week (sobbing and screaming = burning calories)
  • Win a $5,000 shopping trip with FiFi
  • Then go out and buy more bags, shoes and sunglasses. You want the new sass and bide eyewear collection. So chic! The new oversized seventies style or the cute cats eye shapes will transform last season’s look in one second flat. Made in Italy there are 38 different styles to sob and scream over. In a good way.
  • From $379 sass and bide eyewear will be available in select optical stores, boutiques and sass and bide stores from end of October

    Ella Baché Spray Tan

    You are standing in a tiny room. Alone in just your undies. You are wearing a shower cap. You are not Britney Spears. This is scary. Where are you? Only one place. At Ella Baché poised and ready for a spray tan. And what a spray tan. It‘s a great colour, it is even spread, and you look glamorous for days. Plus it glides equally well over cellulite and muscles. Which means in public people may never even spot the difference.

    $49 Spray Tan.

    Issue 186
    • Anya Hindmarsh has become a member of the unluckiest club in London – hers is the latest label to have been targeted by a gang of thieves terrorising the capital’s top fashion brands. In a move that mirrors recent thefts from Marc Jacobs, Luella, Roger Vivier and FrostFrench, Hindmarch’s store on Ledbury Road was ram raided by four people on mopeds reports UK Vogue
    • In Rome head to the Timothy Greenfield-Sanders newest exhibition, "Film Stars: Portraits by Timothy Greenfield-Sanders" at the Carlo Bilotti Museum in Rome. The exhibit, which opens during the Cinema Festa Internazionale di Roma, showcases 50 of the photographer’s favorite images of Hollywood royalty produced between 1976 and 2007.style.com
    • TEXAN uber-model Jerry Hall is preparing to relive her glory days on the Seventies fashion circuit - by writing her autobiography. How could she resist, the industry is saying, when Marie Helvin - a megastar catwalk queen who was at the height of her fame with Hall thirty years ago - has just published her memoirs? Hall has signed a deal with publisher HarperCollins - estimated to be worth approximately £500,000 - to reveal all about her rock ‘n roll lifestyle during the nine years of marriage she shared with Rolling Stone Mick Jagger, as well as her legendary time on the runways.reports UK Vogue
    • As if the celebrity clothing arena weren’t crowded enough, rumors in London are afoot that Brit model Agyness Deyn (pictured left) is set to design a line for Topshop. A spokeswoman for the store said, "Nothing is happening yet," regarding a possible collaboration. However, the model-of-the-moment schmoozed Philip Green, the high street chain’s owner, at the "Golden Age of Couture" gala at London’s Victoria and Albert Museum last month, and an industry source said a collaboration was in the very early stages.
    • The owner of Gucci Group, François Pinault’s influence in the world of fashion is seldom questioned. But the French mogul is also the most influential man in the world of art, according to ArtReview, which appointed Pinault to the top of its list of the 100 most influential people in art for the second year in a row. Pinault, who owns Christie’s auction house and runs a museum in Venice to showcase his collection of modern and contemporary art, is in august company, followed in the number two and three spots by U.S. gallery owner Larry Gagosian and Britain’s Nicholas Serota, who overseas the operations of four Tate museums in the U.K.
    • In London head to the Zoo. Although the word "Zoo" could appropriately describe the buying frenzy and manic itineraries of the art-world animals at Frieze, which ended yesterday, it’s also the official name for the Fair’s most prestigious satellite event. Now in its fourth year, Zoo moved out of the London Zoo and into the far more civilized Royal Academy, where 61 commercial and non-commercial exhibition spaces vied for attention….reports style.com
    • The Box, the Lower East Side’s celebrated pit of hedonism, crossed the Atlantic on Saturday night and set up shop at Wilton’s Music Hall in London’s East End. There, Jemima Khan, Eugenie Niarchos, Annabel Neilson, Coco Brandolini, Elizabeth Saltzman Walker, and Astrid Muñoz were introduced to the cabaret’s singular brand of entertainment (let’s just say things get fairly graphic) style.com
    • The Irish author Anne Enright won the Man Booker prize on Tuesday night for “The Gathering,” a novel in which a woman’s journey home with the body of her dead brother leads her to unearth and confront three generations’ worth of hidden family secrets.
    www.dailymotion.com


    This is THE coolest music video and the styling is fabulous! (what a great name…. The Shoppings!)


    The only blog to do what it says on the Tin: reveal the truth about Art Crime Investigation

    Issue 186
    • Suri Holmes Cruise, the human child-like creature that is said to have been borne of the loins of Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes, continues to grow at an exceedingly alarming rate. She was but a hatchling only a short while ago and now she’s already half as tall as her alleged father, Tom Cruise ..reports pinkisthenewblog (… it’s a shame that the little creature’s power supply can’t keep her running for very long. Maybe they should make her solar-powered or something.)
    • In the future, when scientists unearth Lindsay Lohan’s corpse, they’ll discover she runs on pure alcohol. She can survive without oxygen, water, and food. As long as she’s filled to the brim with Mojito’s, Lindsay can keep going …says the superficial
    • Ivana Trump 58, is getting married for the 3rd time to Italian actor Rossano Rubicondi, 35.
    • Paris Hilton. Humanitarian. Saint. And, oh yeah, camera whore. Turns out Paris’ trip to Rwanda in November is going to be a reality show. Wait until you see the show’s title. Priceless..reports thesuperficial.
    • Britney has been officially charged with her first the hit and run accident. Spears wore a short, black dress to be fingerprinted and photographed after changing out of a I-know-it-makes-me-look-crazy-but-I-like-it-anyways pink wig (pictured left) reports Pinkisthenewblog
    • It is impossible for Jake Gyllenhaal man to look bad.
    • Photographs of Prince William and Kate Middleton have rekindled rumours they will soon announce their engagement.
    • Vicki B. and her gratuitous nipples have made their way back home to LA and said nipples (well, at least the left one) took the youngest Beckham named Cruz out for a day.
    • Britney has been doing her usual errands … shopping at a drug store, going sun tanning, endless visits to Starbucks … but somewhere along the way, she sat in her car, and picked up a book, C.S. Lewis’s The Chronicles of Narnia - The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe
    • ‘Lindsay Lohan is out of money. Apparently her coke and booze sprees have cost her millions, and her three stints in rehab haven’t been cheap either. Lindsay shouldn’t feel too bad because I hear Britney is running out of cash too. Britney must spend at least $1.2 billion weekly at Starbucks. I’m not even factoring in the extra whipped cream’ reports the superficial.
    • Paris Hilton has denied she’s dating Kid Rock
    • Pamela Anderson is definitely not pregnant to Kid Rock or her new boyfriend. Or anyone else we can see.
    • Penelope Cruz has been spotted kissing and cuddling fellow Spaniard Javier Bardem.
    • Victoria Beckham reveals her wild side as she plays a fem bot robot / herself in a new episode of the hit show Ugly Betty (pictured left).
    • Uma Thurman has gone public about her romance with model Elle Macpherson’s ex Arpad Busson.
    The Last Mrs. Astor: A New York Story by Frances Kiernan (Author)

    The Last Mrs. Astor: A New York Story by Frances Kiernan (Author)

    The Last Mrs. Astor: A New York Story by Frances Kiernan (Author)
    The fabulous life of Brooke Astor, a pioneer of philanthropy and for decades a luminary of New York society. Hers is a story out of Edith Wharton. After a disastrous early marriage, Brooke Astor wedded the notoriously ill-tempered Vincent Astor, who died in 1959. In a highly publicized courtroom battle, Brooke fought off an attempt to break Vincent’s will, which left some $67 million to the Vincent Astor Foundation. As the foundation’s president, Brooke would use this legacy to benefit New York, where the Astor fortune had been made. At her one-hundredth birthday, princes and presidents honored her, but in 2006 a grandson petitioned the courts to have his father removed as Brooke’s guardian.This biography gives us back the woman so loved and admired, whose hands-on approach would inspire future philanthropists.
    $14
    Publisher: W. W. Norton (May 21, 2007)


    The  Christmas List

    The

    The  Christmas List

    Christmas List
    Stylist: The Interpreters of Fashion by Sarah Mower,Raul Martinez,Anna Wintour
    From the editors of Style.com, the hub of runway buzz, comes this savvy look at the individuals who propel the fashion world forward and declare what’s hot and what’s not. Called upon by designers, editors, photographers, and celebrities, stylists have a sixth sense for what is now and next in the fashion ether. Featuring sixteen of today’s top tastemakers, Stylist focuses on these fashion insiders whose precocious sense for the next big thing often results in trends of global proportions. Organized by stylist and featuring the photography of such luminaries as Cecil Beaton, Richard Avedon, Steven Meisel, and Annie Leibovitz among others, this book documents the work and contributions of each stylist through photographs of their creative output and inspirations. (FiFi declined to appear in this book for privacy reasons).
    $47 Publisher: Rizzoli (October 30, 2007)

    Issue 186

    Theres no shopping this week. Tears and Sobs all round. Think of the money you are saving. Think of the money you can spend next weekFiFi has not had a minute to get out of her Balenciaga heels to sit down and write. The good news is that she has been too busy nicking into The Morning show to talk shoes. She has been presenting the Whats What Style Sessions from Bondi to Newcastle and now is hopping on a plane to Brisbane. The bad news? From the 29th October she will be in Paris. Sorry.
    See FiFi live in action and book a seat for a style session
    So now sit back relax and drool over spring summer’s best shows from WWD;
    LANVIN
    One of the wonderful things about fashion in general and especially in Paris is that there is no one right way. From the wildly fantastical to the uber-practical, if it’s good, it will find an audience. That said, there is something almost bizarre in the way Alber Elbaz has connected with his audience, both the industry pros who see the clothes on the runway and, ultimately, the women who buy them. You would have been hard-pressed to find a woman exiting his Lanvin show on Sunday who was not aglow with the rush of possibilities — how the clothes will look in my store, on the pages of my magazine, on me.

    Elbaz is doing something fairly rare these days. Not only does he make clothes for real adults — virtually all designers with significant business do that — he makes no bones about it. And yet he manages to put them on the runway in a manner that elevates real-life fabulous to the level of its runway-only counterpart. “There’s no transparency and we don’t have any prints,” he boasted before the show, implying clearly his contention that his customers will wear the latter sparingly and the former, not at all. Elbaz’s spring is all about inventive — make that ingenious — draping aided big-time by the “P” word — polyester. He used this wonderfully supple, fluid fabric for more than half the collection, including sensual no-seam dresses and flyaway trenchcoats in navy and taupe for an ultrachic update on the classic ensemble, and a prime candidate for the season’s best buy-in-multiples uniform. Dresses sans coats were swirled to lean perfection and belted, and while Elbaz also offered a glamorous take on sportswear. He brightened up with jewel-toned cocktail dresses in shades of emerald, amethyst and sapphire in typically crisp chemises adorned with demonstrative ruffles at the neck. Conversely, a white dress got a flurry of feathers — in front only, the better for sitting through dinner. For big evenings, Elbaz went gracefully flamboyant, with high-impact, low-anxiety, ruffle-edged tents of color that billowed as the girls walked.
     
    MIU MIU
    The world’s a stage for Miuccia Prada, who appropriated theater clichés for her spring Miu Miu collection. “It’s all representations of life mixed with the idea of theater,” she said backstage. “It’s about how people dress themselves to perform in life.” To drive the point home, she showed against projections of performance imagery — "Swan Lake,” an orchestra, the Burning Man — which distracted rather than enhanced in the Avenue Foch mansion’s cramped quarters. In Prada’s eyes, life will require abbreviated options for spring, as nosebleed-worthy hemlines were the collection’s strongest statement. The traditional theater personas of Harlequin and Pierrot were well-represented on micro-minidresses — or hip-length tops, depending on how you look at them — where Prada mixed a multicolored diamond motif with rich, Klimt-like prints and trompe l’oeil dickeys. Of course, Prada’s not one to ignore the fringe. Thus, she also played to characters who populate stereotypical male fantasies: the French maid in white, bibbed blouses worn with naughty black blouson bloomers; the Playboy bunny in her sheer, button-on cuffs and collars and busty tops, and the Lolita, channeled via starched white baby dolls worn with teetering stilettos and lacy anklets. Sexy? You bet. But for all that obvious eroticism, the clothes charmed rather than offended.
    CHLOE
    When Paulo Melim Anderson took over the creative reins at Chloé last season, he put forth a bold new statement, one many found too aggressive for a house better known for its charming, girlish appeal. Well, it seems like Andersson paid close attention to those critics. He lightened the mood considerably for spring, doing so by playing majorly to the current transparency trend his way, without a ruffle in sight. Instead, he delivered it all with an artsy panache. To wit: there were paint smudges and broad sweeping brush strokes across dresses, jumpers and skirts. Other looks, meanwhile, were intriguingly patchworked with abstract blocks of color.Everything had an undone, haphazard — but not careless — feel. Cuts, seams and splices of color came in inventive asymmetrics. When Anderson digressed to include a few tailored looks and cozy to-the-floor cardigans, it left one hoping for more to add variety to his lineup. The numerous artsy flyaway frocks made the collection a bit repetitive — we got the message — and it would have been nice to see a broader vision of his girl. But, to his credit, this gentler attitude is a move in the right direction. After all, the Chloé customer doesn’t stomp all angst-like; she steps out, rather, with an alluringly cool confidence.
    Little Lemon Tarts

    Little Lemon Tarts
    Need a little sweetie to take on a picnic? Perhaps a little something to serve after dinner? These little tarts are sexy.

    You need for 100 models or 8 fashionistas, 4 men …Makes 8.
    2 short crust frozen pastry sheets
    60g butter
    1/3 cup caster sugar
    2 eggs
    1 teasp lemon zest
    70ml lemon juice
    1 tabs cornflour
    1 lemon
    1 tabs caster sugar for accessorising later on the lemon slices

    • Preheat oven to 180
    • Get pastry sheets out of fridge
    • Get wine out of fridge
    • Put wine back into fridge; it’s too early.
    • I said put the wine back in the fridge. With the chocolate.
    • Zest the lemon.
    • Watch the manicure
    • Juice the lemon.
    • Scramble around in bottom drawer to find a big muffin tray with 8 muffin spots.(Muffin spots not tops)
    • Moisturise the muffin pan with butter. Think Creme de la Mer. It’s just makes it all seem better.
    • Now slice up the pastry sheets into 8 squares. Best if the pastry is still slightly firm. As your hips were before you ate these.
    • Gently press the chic, little squares of pastry into the muffin pans. Yes you have to use your fingers.
    • Apply as you would a face mask.
    • Chuck the butter and sugar into a bowl (always better than the bench. Not so messy) and then give them a good beating. They love it. You want them as creamy and pale as Nicole Kidman in Cold Mountain.
    • Add the eggs one at a time. Beating it all up after each one.
    • Now toss in the lemon zest , lemon juice and the cornflour. Beat it more. Beating is good for the upper arms. Lemon tarts are bad for lower bottom. Muffin bottom!
    • Dip your finger and taste it. No calories in that . Now spoon about two tabs of the gooey lemon mix into each of the pastry squares waiting quietly and patiently in their tins for attention.
    • Whack in the oven and cook till the filling looks firm and set. Think Joan Rivers face. If it doesn’t move it’s cooked. The pastry should be golden as a Miu Miu shoe.
    • Before you serve them you can slice up some lemon, sprinkle them with sugar and toss under the griller.This will caramelise the lemons in about 2 mins.
    • Accessorise each lemon tart with a piece of the sexy, little caramelised lemon.
    • Sprinkle with icing sugar for a few more calories
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