The FiFi Report 134
5 September 2006
issue 134

"Wedding? What wedding?" Hugh Jackman
"She wants to do everything as you would for a normal wedding," Nicole’s PR ( Nicole thinks normal is exciting .)
"Do you realise there are babies inside dying while you are out here fighting over a picture?" A woman outside the Sydney Children’s Hospital as a scuffle broke out between photographers shooting Nicole.
"Yeah, I suppose so. But it’s what we do, you know.” Photographers reply
“ MINIMALIST, white and with a hint of old-world romance is how Nicole Kidman’s dress may look when the actress walks down the aisle for the second time” predicted SMH. (it was ivory, frothy and over the top puff.)
“ They had a stylist for the wedding so it was just schmick” Keith brother Shane. Bless
"I was hoping to be a wedding crasher, I’m a person seeking love, so I hope they get the best of it." A stalker hanging outside of the chapel
"I do, I do, I do!" a pack of passing cyclists yell out passing the chapel.
"I wouldn’t say it was the longest [kiss] in history — I’ve seen some long ones — but it was not too bad," Father Paul Coleman, the Kidmans’ family priest.
"Above average, if you want to know the truth." Father Paul Coleman on the kiss (he loves dishing)
"You hear of stage parents, well we had a stage daughter." Nicole Mother’s speech ( ain’t that the truth)
"Thank you Nicole, it’s because of you that there wasn’t one photographer out to catch us," Hugh Jackman on why he, Russell Crowe and Naomi Watts were able to sneak out to go skinny dipping at Bondi without a paparazzi in sight.
“Keith is truly in love. This will last absolutely” Keith’s Brother
"It won’t last very long.” Keith’s ex-girlfriend.
"You can see the bulge from the bone in her pelvis to halfway up her navel” New Idea reports on her pregnancy
"She’s not pregnant" Kidman’s US spokeswoman Catherine Olim
“ It was the most incredible wedding." A guest gushes
"Man, It was like every other wedding I’ve been to — except they were famous." Xaxophonist Blaine Whittaker who performed at the wedding.
"Are they shooting a movie here?" A taxi driver outside the hotel asked
"No, it’s Nicole Kidman’s wedding."
"Who’s that?" He asked.

Kayser Platinum Body T-shirts and Leggings

What’s the first thing you do on a shoot? Sob over the Lanvin? Scream for a coffee? Gasp watching the model eat? The first thing you do on a shoot is discuss everyone’s star signs. Pity I don’t believe in that nonsense. But I am a fashion psychic. And as I look into my crystal ball I see next season will be all about layering, layering and more layering. Look at Marc Jacobs Fall 06 collection and you will see. So start with the trend right now. Stay warm and groovy wearing the Kayser Platinum Body T-shirts and leggings. The best T-shirts around, they are seamless and in a soft as suede cotton elastane and so, so comfortable. Buy the Long sleeve T $39, the T back singlet and the leggings $29 in all colours from white, black to choc brown. Throw them in the washing machine. My prediction is you will love them. Especially if you are a Libran.

Platinum Body from David Jones and Myer. 1800 810 449

SALE! Hermès Australia
SYDNEY…Thursday July 6 – Thursday July 13 (inclusive)
77 Castlereagh Street, Sydney, NSW, 2000
MELBOURNE… Friday July 21 – Saturday July 29 (inclusive)
115-119 Collins Street, Melbourne, VIC, 3000

Chunky is back

Chunky is back. Chunky shoes. Chunky heels. Chunky, big bags. Chunky sweaters and chunky jewels. Yes, chunky big gold or silver link chains are hot. Think 80’s. Think Rap stars. Think about ditching anything mild mannered. Pile them on with eclectic beads and leather or just sling one chain around your neck for a dramatic edge. Head to Diva for cheap but chic brass gold necklaces and bracelets from about $10. To Mimco for serious gold necklaces $129, and bracelets $89 or fossick through vintage stores. Click onto and buy the Bottega Veneta woven chain necklace £1,706.38 or check out Sienna looking fabulous here. Hint: Chunky chains and chunky shoes means the rest of you must be streamlined. Including your hips. Sorry.
Gold chain necklaces from or Diva (02 9938 3311).

Benefit Lyin’ Eyes Concealer

We all know there are some things women will always lie about: their jean size (to shop assistant), the calories in chocolate (to themselves), morning alcohol consumption (to the cat), the price of shoes (to husband) and botox (to boss/friends/relatives). Then there is the great lie. The birth date. I am not talking star sign. Now you don’t need to lie about your age. Not if you have Lyin’ eyes. It’s my hot, new beauty trick. It’s a touch up click-click brush with a lightly tinted under-eye corrector from Benefit. I love it. Brush it on to camouflage all those dreadful bags, circles and laugh lines. You will look 20 years younger. Your wrinkles will completely and utterly vanish. (OK. That last bit is not quite true). Comes in 3 shades.

$34 Lyin’ Eyes Concealer from Myer.

issue 134

Prada has tapped three Asian celebrities for the Miu Miu fall ad campaign —women the company describes as "strong" and "warrior dolls, who simultaneously represent a futuristic vision mixed with the depth and wisdom of ancient custom and culture." Chinese actress and singer Zhou Xun, Chinese actress Dong Jie and Japanese model Lina Ohta were photographed by Inez Van Lamsweerde and Vinoodh Matadin at the Lapérouse restaurant in Paris, where Miuccia Prada staged her fall show. WWD
·Who’s your daddy? This is so cool…It’s a hotel in Cape Town and an art lover’s dream. The website is great .
·Off to Paris for the Couture? Check out the Balenciaga exhibition everyone is talking about. Musee de la Mode from à 6 juillet 2006. At 107, rue de Rivoli, 75001 Paris
·While in Paris visit the hot new 4 story home wares store called Silvera
·Or head to Azzedine Alaïa’s a new accessories boutique about to open on Rue de Moussy across from his HQ in the Marais designed by his friend Marc Newson. WWD
·The hot new hotel everyone is talking about? It’s in Kentucky. Yes. Kentucky. ‘Shocking photographs in the restaurant, Chuck Close tapestries in the rooms, red plastic penguins in the atrium gallery-, the new 21C puts the ‘hot’ in ‘art hotels.’ see it here;
·Parfums Christian Dior has tapped director Rob Marshall and Aussie cinematographer Dion Beebe — the duo behind "Memoirs of a Geisha" and "Chicago," — to direct Monica Bellucci in a commercial for its Rouge Dior lipstick line. WWD
·Heading to Prague? Stay here.
·Kate Moss will star in a campaign to relaunch one of Bulgari’s original scents.
·Burberry has gone for another all-star cast of Brits — including Kate Moss — for its fall ads, marking the firm’s 150th anniversary. The campaign was shot in black and white by Mario Testino and features Brits of every age, from Stella Tennant and her toddler daughter Jasmine Lasnet to Lady Jacquetta Eliot, the Sixties style icon. Also in the ads are Bryan Ferry, Penelope Tree and the boys from the indie rock band Kasabian. The campaign features celebrity offspring Otis, Isaac and Tara Ferry; Max Irons, son of Jeremy Irons; Edie Campbell, daughter of Sophie Hicks; Fenton Bailey, son of David Bailey, and Louis Eliot, son of Lady Jacquetta.

people.aol.com


It’s Britney doing a Demi Moore - pregnant and naked- on the cover of Harper’s Bazaar. NB: "This isn’t what Britney Spears looks like. Either they pulled her face off some old photos or had to throw together a supercomputer to handle the processing necessary to make her look this good. They’ve got super computers that play professional level chess now, so I’m sure they’ve got one capable of making Britney Spears look half decent. Although the first three they tried probably exploded when given the task." Thesuperficial


It’s about sex, drugs and gossip!

issue 134

Keyhole (Nicole and Keith) jetted off to Tahiti for their Honeymoon. - only to find Eva Longoria staying at the same resort with boyfriend Tony Parker.
Jude and Sienna are still at it.
Model Petra Nemcova is still dating James Blunt even after she saw him in his bathers.
Selma Blair and her husband Ahmet Zappa are divorcing.
Nicole Richie “cuddled and looked very cozy” with Matt Dillon.
Diana Krall and husband Elvis Costello are expecting a baby.
Everyone ignored the wedding of Marcia Cross to stockbroker Tom Mahoney.
Angelina and Brad have had a series of personal photographs stolen, including intimate pictures from a baby shower in Namibia. A baby shower is intimate.
Heather Locklear and David Spade have laughed off rumors they are dating.Yes we are all laughing.
Princess Mary must be pregnant again because she was seen wearing a dress from last year.
Is Keanu Reeves is engaged to Claire Forlani ?
Jake Gyllenhaal makes us all so very happy when he is photographed working out wearing nothing but shorts and singlet. Very Happy.
Patricia Arquette married her boyfriend ( wearing a shockingly bad head dress).
Diane Kruger has found a new boyfriend in the shape of Dawson’s Creek’s Joshua Jackson. What shape is that?
Desperately seeking Suri…’ There’s a reason no pictures of Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes’ daughter have been revealed yet. Nobody is willing to pay enough money for them. A photo of Suri was offered to WireImage but the offer was turned down . There’s one other explanation: there never was any baby to begin with. Sure Katie Holmes got fat and went to a hospital, but nobody has seen the child yet so there’s no proof it even exists.’Thesuperficial.
Britney Spears was spotted in New York with newly dyed black hair. I guess she was sick of all the jokes and felt it was time to change her image. Somebody should point out people didn’t think she was stupid because she was blonde, they thought she was stupid because she was really stupid. You can put a donkey in a lab coat and tape a diploma to its back, but I’m pretty sure at the end of the day it still has no idea how to work a Bunsen burner. ( see Zip Zip.com for the photos)


The Sound of No Hands Clapping: A Memoir (Hardcover) ….by Toby Young
In the best-selling How to Lose Friends & Alienate People, Young hilariously tracked his rise and fall in the New York media world working for Vanity Fair. After that debacle, he turned his attention to L.A where he endured a trial-and-error period attempting to be a Hollywood screenwriter. Alas, Hollywood didn’t pan out and his “return to London was a bitter disappointment.” But readers won’t be disappointed with this warm, funny, self-effacing memoir, which will appeal to anyone who has ever tried to accomplish anything–and that amounts to all of us.
$16 Da Capo Press (June 12, 2006)

The Christmas List
Guy Bourdin: A Message for You ..by Guy Bourdin, Nicolle Meyer
The late 1970s, recognized as the highest note in Bourdiní s career, are the focal point of this two-volume edition. Volume I is dedicated to the legendary, nearly forgotten images he made with Nicolle Meyer as his model. Meyer appeared in over 30 of his famous campaigns for Charles Jourdan and in iconic French Vogue editorials. Volume II is a road trip through Bourdinís visual landscape, a collage of images mapping his artistic search and vision. Texts, Polaroids, poems, sketches and contact sheets unfold in time with Nicolle Meyerís memories, and inscribe moments of Bourdinís working process that would otherwise be lost. Glamourous!
$94, Publisher: Steidl Publishing; Slipcase edition (May 31, 2006)

issue 134

Still shopping the sales? Go for shoes. Fabulous shoes. Platforms and anything with a chunky heel. The pointy toe stiletto is looking a little tired, old and quite frankly cheap. Ewww. We don’t want that. The only pointy toe heels you are allowed to wear must be serious quality. Like Jimmy Choo. As you peruse the sales grab grey, metallic, black and anything that has a dash of red. These colours will take you into next season. You want crop jackets, skinny jeans and anything with a big graphic prints. Go after chic, simple dresses; they are so right for summer, look immediately elegant and they were all over the runways for next winter. See Lanvin and Prada collections at Style.com. Steer clear of horrid watermelon, pink and anything remotely Boho chic. Please.
Economy:
David Jones: Head to the coat department for Hot Buy #1. Strolling through here I stumbled upon a rather fabulous buy : a coat by a label called Urban Tailor. In a charcoal grey it is double breasted with a belt and epaulettes. I tried it on. I had to. It has a very flattering, fitted, narrow 70’s cut and is a chic mix of light wool and cashmere which makes it very trans seasonal. Looks expensive. A must buy for $149. NB: Grey is big for next winter and breaks up all your basic black.
French Connection: Hot Buy #2. Another great find lurking here. Buy the dark navy cotton crop pea coat cut with a trapeze shape a back pleat. A great cut. Perfect for the navy and black trend. Ideal for trans seasonal dressing. $179. Also new in is the white with black stripe empire T with a self belt $69; the black cotton Victoriana shirts (enough of those?) $79; the seam front skinny jeans $139 and a navy satin tank $59.On sale check out the black city shorts now $39; the gold/bronze buttons lurex T $39; and lots of wrap dresses. If you must. Maybe there is a reason they are all on sale.
Portmans: Getting better in here. Check out the red and white print wrap jersey DVF dress. The wrap DVF dress has just about reached their tipping point. Buy here for $99. There are cute red patent ballets flats $39; the black patent peep toe ballet flats $49 (see the original in Belinda); a cute glomesh black croissant bags $39 and the cute short trench ( as reported last week) $149. There is a chic black cotton satine pencil button thro skirt $69.
Cue: More reductions on the pieces reported last week. New in is a chic empire line dress with wide straps, a scoop neck with a bow grosgrain belt in a navy $229; a sheer white, empire cami with a black and white stripe cami under it; very Miu Miu $169; a cream puff sleeve shirt with great big double cuffs $149 and more Roland Mouret style dresses. Ditto the Tipping point. There is a chic black and grey stripe empire top $79 and a fab cap sleeve dress with wide neck and a wide thick belt just under the empire. Hides all sorts of things around the hip area. $189. How lovely.
Jag: Check out the shoes here. There is the Lanvin esque black round toe platforms with a stack heel ( it’s everywhere but the only shoe to wear) almost the same as the Witchery version $109. On sale are cute faux snakeskin peep toe wedges now about $70. The ‘Bondi’ jeans here are great $99.
Just Jeans: The choc brown distressed leather blazer is on sale here for $149. Checkout the black skinny jeans $109 too.
MNG; There is a sale happening here with 30% to 50% off. Too many tops to mention but worth looking at and rummaging because it’s all from next their next summer collection. There are cute Balenciaga style white ‘crown’ embellished tanks for $50, chic stone chinos $129 and lots of Broderie Anglaise style tops and dresses.
Mollini; Buy the bronze or metallic pointy toe flat sling backs a la Marc Jacobs now on sale $75. I see too many pointy toes. Go for the choc brown satin and suede platforms with an ankle strap and a bow detail $148.
Kookai: There is a lot of navy here, as predicted it will be everywhere this summer. Check out the cute navy high neck Victoriana cotton heresy sleeveless frill top $59; the navy skinny jeans $149; and the navy drape empire cotton jersey dress $109. There is a navy linen Trench $269. There a million wrap dresses and a very nice muslin grey cami with a wrap and tie self belt $99.


Business Class:

Country Road: still on sale. Some pieces are 50% of the marked price. Check out the fab grey crop pants or city shorts about $50; the chinos about $99; the Prince of Wales trench now $299. There are lots of beads $29; and camisoles about $59. Not on sale are cute black and white stripe scoop neck ¾ sleeve T’s $59; also in grey and blue. Check out the sleeveless, pleated, crinkle black chiffon dress $299; the crop black and white tweed pants $199 and I must say the black muslin cotton cami with cream lining is a great buy $119. (As reported last week). It is a flattering cut and skims very nicely over the muffin top (not that I have one of course; just thinking of you. Bless). There is a pencil skirt, over the knee but with back split $99 and a chic grey rib knit cardigan $99.
David Lawrence; check out the sale with 20% off tailored suits. Go for the rib knits here. It’s the only place to go for fine knits in chic colours and very good prices.
Midas; Buy the black patent ballet flats $264 and the peep toe bow front heels $198 are a great alternative if you can’t do the chunky platforms. Buy the very Manolo style gold ankle strap heels on sale $99.
Max & Co: there is a 30% off sale; Steer clear of the pastels and check out the black and white tweeds jacket and skirts. There is a black nylon puffa jacket seriously warm and padded $402; cute little black dresses now $285; and gorgeous little black wool melton peacoat now

$560. The satin black and white spot tops and skirts are chic too.
Carla Zampatti: I spy with my little eye a lovely black and white spot, chiffon, sleeveless, empire top with a drawstring neckline. $369. Awfully nice.
Bettina Liano: On sale. Best buys are the black wool peacoat, one of the nicest I have seen and a bit longer, just over the hips now $599. Also buy the black cotton twill peacoat with brass buttons, also in stone and navy $375. There is a funky very 80’s denim shirt with a frill front now $129; and of course the ruffle front organza blouse $129.
Morrissey: New in is a stone D/B belted trench also in black. It’s a nice length, stopping just at the knee. Not so sure about pocket flaps on the hips. Is that going to make my hips look big in this? $279.

First Class
Myer shoe department on sale: check out the gold Chloe heels with one strap and a kitten heel now $560; the Alessandro del’ Aqua black round toe sling backs with serious sparkle and sequin toe $360 also in a flat version. The Manolos are very classic; check out the brown ankle strap heels, one strap across the toe with brass stud detail buckles $775; and the bronze or gold heels with two thin straps and an ankles strap now $700. In Stella McCartney check out the fab blush square toe chunky heels with satin ribbon toe $595; and the cream heels with a little silver buckle on toe $525. Don’t forget that Stella just don’t do leather! In Marc Jacobs a lot of kooky 80’s style shoes are on sale. If you are young and brave you may buy them. Check out the very 80’s court shoes in hot pink, aqua and gold now $460. See the Sigerson Morrison rubber pointy toe flats in green and purple reduced to $105 but I really can’t advise anyone to wear them. But I can tell you to wear the Givenchy brown square toe heels with a bow front now $528.
David Jones shoes: check out the new season Marc Jacobs; There are green sling back sandals with 60’s blue patent daisy detail on the toe $625; the black suede pumps with white stitching with a toggle on toe is a must buy. Also in a flat version ; lovely for $599. See the aqua version too. Check out the rope wedge espadrilles with a stripe toe ( last season’s?) $319. There are chunky wooden clog sandals with red wide straps $399; and brown suede, round toe pumps with silver studs and ankle strap $750.
Belinda Double Bay: New season stock is in. Let’s start with the Miu Miu. Buy it all. Check out the fab white cotton dress with a wrap and tie waist $995; the white narrow cotton pants $430 and the gorgeous white and graphic print car coat (the trench/coat for summer is big news) $1840. Buy the cream, chiffon, crepe de chine top with black straps and a frill $690 ( You can see where Cue and Veronika Maine get all their inspiration) and the black skinny cotton twill pants – a must buy wardrobe staple again- for $540. There is a poplin black and white print empire dress with cap sleeves $1400 and a black sleeveless washed muslin cotton top with a frill $630. Check out a divine cream crepe de chine cami with frills and black straps $420. The stone belted leather napa blazer is absolutely divine $2780; the red poplin African tie dye print 50’s skirt is cool $970 and the oversized man style blue cotton shirts is very hot - $395. Buy the cute red and white stripe tank $270 (almost same price as all the copies non?). Marni: Check out the Marni cotton café au lait tank with a drawstring grey fabric belt $645; the fab white sleeveless sundress with wide straps and paneled in cotton $1067; the white sleeveless V neck wrap and tie top $845; the sensational dingle dangle tortoiseshell, leather and resin necklace $795. Also the white patent disc necklaces are divine too $545. There are fabulous bags and tops and belts all scattered with the cut out leather or plastic discs. Fabulous. Also Check out the Calypso collection with a lot of bright wrinkle crinkle cotton . There are hot pink and yellow wrap dresses that would look so right on St Barts (where the Calypso store originated) and the cute lurex cardigans in great colours are around $250. The Issa print dresses are all gorgeous a bit Missoni looking in red, navy and cream $895 or in a red print drawstring dress. $895 Jamin Puech known for their bags have now done a few pieces of clothing and there is a cute black/blue print African 50’s style skirt $685. Also check out the amazing new collection of dresses by Duro Olowu (everyone has copied them go here to check them out) from $1990 in a palm print and all very 70’s. Gorgeous.

 

Roasted Carrots with Ginger and Chilli

Roasted Carrots with Ginger and Chilli …from The Sydney Magazine…
Finally. A new, different way to cook boring old carrots. These are quite simply sensational served with a roast. Or just eat them by themselves as an entrée. All you do is caramelize them in butter, oil, rosemary and chilli (of course) and then toss them in ginger.

You need:
A large knob of unsalted butter
Oil in the baking dish
8 fresh crunchy long carrots NB: cut lengthways to make chic long sticks
4 large red mild chillies split in half lengthways. Remove seeds if you want to
A stalk or 2 of fresh rosemary
Knob of ginger peeled and cut into small thin strips
sel et poivre.

·Heat oven to about 200
·Pour a glass of wine
·Think about Keith and Nicole honeymooning on a luxury, tropical Tahiti Island
·Cut the carrots lengthways into chic little long sticks
·Don’t think about you at home just cutting up carrots.
·Cut the ginger into chic little thin sticks resembling Nicole
·Pull off the leaves of the rosemary
·Slice up the chillies into chic little Nicole sticks.
·Grab a baking dish big enough to hold all the carrots in a single layer.
·Put it on top of the stove so you can cook and caramelize the carrots for about 5 minutes before you whack it in the oven to bake. Yes. On the stove.
·Add the big knob of butter and oil into the baking dish on the stovetop
·Throw in the carrots and make sure they are completely moisturized with lots of outrageously naughty butter and oil.
·See how gorgeous they look? What a lovely Hermes orange they are.
·Don’t think about the Hermes Birkin one of the Olsen twins was seen carrying. (You might be ill).
·Toss the rosemary and the chillies in with the pretty carrots and give it a stir.
·Now you can throw it all into the oven and cook for about 15 to 20 minutes. Even longer to shrink and caramelise the carrots and let all those flavours melt and infuse together.
·Don’t be tempted to keep stirring them. The less you touch them the better. Like your Amex.
·Pour another wine.
·Serve with rare roast lamb and accessorise with the all the fresh ginger scattered nonchalantly over the carrots. Add a dash of simple chic white on the side (these are called potatoes).
·Grind over lots of salt and pepper.
·Think about how Nicole probably lives on raw carrots. With no butter. Or oil. Think how poor Nicole is missing out. Bless.
This recipe is not inspired by carrot hair and/or stick figures.

issue 134

Wah Wah …Written and Directed by Richard E Grant
Who: Gabriel Byrne, Miranda Richardson, Emily Watson, Julie Walters
Genre: semi autobiographical coming of age film set in Africa with Mildly offensive language, inoffensive sex and cringe-worthy British behavior.
The Plot: 1969. British Expats live a charmed life of boredom, booze, servants and casual adultery in a British Colonial outpost. Young boy catches glamorous mother having an affair. Mother runs off with lover. Father gets pissed. A lot. Father marries again. To an American. A free spirited American. Everyone yells. Everyone gets pissed. Everyone tries to keep stiff upper lip. Mother keeps coming back and leaving. Everyone is dysfunctional. They put on the play of Camelot. True. Young boy finally grows up. Has his first kiss with unusual looking girl. Has to be director’s daughter. It is.
Acting: All fantastic.
Photography: sunsets, sweeping plains, dusty roads all shot with old fashioned 60’s style lighting.
Set design: Love the fabulous African houses perched on hills with huge sprawling manicured gardens, a pool, servants, groovy butterfly chairs, funky 60’s curtains and sexy lamps.
Salon de Beaute: very early 70’s makeup and hair. Boy gets to wear Clockwork Orange mascara and false eyelashes.
Wardrobe: Think white, Pucci frocks, graphic floral prints, 60’s disc belts, embroidered cardigans. Think Marni and Prada spring/summer 06.
Mind drifted to shopping …looking at all those groovy 60’s frocks.
Botox: Double dose. One for wrinkles induced by watching boy deserted by his mother. The other to deal with non stop screaming. Bless
Waterproof mascara: go for lashings of waterproof mascara. Tissues. Lots of tissues.
Smooches: It’s intimated rather than explicit. Sorry.
Blood’n’guts: Only the emotional kind. NB: Watching Julie Walters start to strip naked to jump into the pool is scary.
Best line: “ too da loo, toodle pip, humbly jumbly, hoity toity, hootie snootie, ding dong…it all sounds like alot of old wah wah”
Moral to the story: Every family has its own language ( see above)
Best review: "I admire how Grant’s writing and direction take Africa for granted (pardon the pun) in the sense that we are spared longing long shots of landscapes and similar signs of awestruck filmmaking. It’s is the real thing, no wah-wah about it." URBAN CINEFILE
Best worst review: "Full of too much blah, blah. And way too much of the shrill, shrieking, screaming, carrying-on variety." DESERET NEWS.
See it or donate to the Prada bag fund: When you think your family is dysfunctional you get depressed. You go shopping. You buy a Prada bag. See this movie and know your family is way too normal. This is a good thing.

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