“I want an empire like Oprah’s. I may do it with a little more cleavage, but I plan to get there” model Tyra Banks (Darl have you looked at Oprah? she has 2 cleavages).
“He looks like a high-school kid who has some kind of hideous glandular problem that has promoted advanced aging.” Simon Doonan, on John Kerry’s man cleavage?
My parents were so nutty, I fell into this trap with this nutty guy and then it was all nutty” Drew Barrymore on her marriage to Tom Green (nutty is as nutty does).
“I’m a big believer in karma. When I was about 15, I found my spirituality. I kinda found it on my own, on the floor of a club. But I always felt like there was a god or a goddess or whatever, like a higher power. I’ve always felt I had a guardian angel, so when I was 15 I got a guardian angel tattooed on my back.” Angelina Jolie (she doesn’t need a cleavage.).
“ I reveal more of myself when I’m extremely open emotionally than when I’ve got my shirt off.” Angelina Jolie ( Maybe she does.Nutty.)
“I need clothes not the handkerchiefs they’re selling now.” Mary J bilge on not wanting to show too much cleavage ( nutty)
“What I love about inexpensive clothes is their honesty about their function in my own life” Isaac Mizrahi on designing for Target and honest handkerchiefs.
“If that’s supposed to be fat I want to be fat” on seeing Renee Zewellger.
“”Elves live in harmony with the world and I try to do that ” Orlando bloom (can someone tell him that it was only a movie. Nutty).
“Unfortunately because the media followed the relationship closely, the story didn’t end as happily as it does in the song. The reality wasn’t quite as romantic. But this liaison was, of course, still a first-class inspiration. Yes, it’s a shame, but life doesn’t stop because love has knocked on the door and decided to leave again ” Lenny Kravitz on Nicole and why I think it was a set up (“the reality wasn’t quite as romantic”) mmm I smell a rat.
“It sounds pretty low, I don’t know the facts of course - I wasn’t there. I’m not sure whether she’s trash or tramp. I’d say tramp, though. She can’t get enough.. PR.” Uma Thurman on nutty Rebecca Loos arriving at the Kill Bill 2 premiere. (Low and trashy like your ex husband Uma - a rat)
“I’ve learned not to trust anyone who thinks he has God exclusively on his side. Especially when he’s the president of the United States.” Richard Gere on the biggest nut and rat of them all!

It is the season, or should I say the decade of the IT bag. But sometimes we don’t need to use the Birken; sometimes it looks just a bit teeny-weeny obvious especially when you’re having a coffee at Bondi. Sometimes you just need a casual throwaway bag to chuck everything in and toss across your shoulders. And I discovered just the thing at Funkis. Simple, roomy and made from sheer starched cotton they are called the ‘easy bag’ and come in lots of divine colours (red, pink, white and blue and more!) with a long handle all cut in one piece like a great big tear drop. But you won’t be crying: they are only $24 and you want one in every colour!

Funkis Easy Bag $24, 0221 9370

Jewels are in big time this season. Earrings, rings, Tiaras, pearl. You name it and I want to wear it all especially the tiara. But who can wear all those jewels during the day? I don’t care what they say, I love Carolyn Bessette’s clean look (so nineties ..must be called retro by now?) and so my ode to jewels and THE item du jour this week is brooches. Of course the look is all about looking a bit eclectic and individual and so you must forage for these pretty little things at markets or St Vinnies. But you can also go to Fleur Wood who has some gorgeous vintage ones she picked up in the New York Flea markets from $70. Go to Witchery for cool diamante pins in lots of colours $59, Mimco have some pink cameo brooches for $79 and kilt pins with charms $89. Sportsgirl have a diamante ones for $19, Bulb have some pretty vintage ones or head into Prada for their chic fabric crafty ones. And remember you can mix ‘item du jours’ together so arrange these on your shrunken Tweed marc jacobs jacket and feel groovy (for this week at least!).

Who is that old lady looking back at you in the mirror you ask. There must be some mistake. I want my money back. Where is that dewy fresh soft glowing skin? Oh, yes there it is in the bottle in my bathroom cabinet! I’ll just slather that on under my foundation before I run out to the door (hate to keep George Clooney waiting). Who ever invented this little gem of “Instant luminosity from a pump” (no not rude) deserves a medal. Yes, it has been out for about a year but I love it and must recommend it to all you poor people stuck in offices all day and who need an “instant sheer, oil-free, lightweight skin-brightening lotion whose unique formula features light-reflective crystals and skin-enhancing minerals to instantly brighten skin, soften flaws and boost radiance with vitamins A, C & E and SPF 15.” But it’s ALL true. (You need this. So does that old lady who lives in bathroom.)

Revlon Skinlights (Instant Skin Brightener) $29.95 at major department stores and daggy ones too.

Milan Furniture fair was on last week so check out this website with lots of shots of what was hot http://www.core77.com/reactor/hb_milan2003.asp
“Peter Marino is building the new Chanel Tower in Tokyo and it will look like nothing else anywhere. The 10-story facade will be a dazzling, conceptual replica of a classic Chanel tweed suit. This effect is being achieved by using layer upon layer of woven stainless steel, liquid crystal glass from Austria and maybe four million light bulbs that will twinkle on and off, startlingly creating a building that could be made of tweed” from WWD.
Marks & Spencer’s Vittorio Radice is launching a magazine with Tyler Brulé. “The new general merchandise chief of M&S has just unveiled the first issue of Design Details, a slick, magazine-like shopping directory featuring home ware items only from M&S. The 72-page magazine comes out twice a year, created by Brulé, offers up everything from food pages, recipes to travel stories on Tenerife to lush spreads of uber-groomed suburbanites” from WWD.
The Brit tabloid The Daily Mirror has launched 3am Magazine, based on the 3am column which features celebrities at their worst with stories like “Whose Juicy Bum Is This?” with snapshots of the bottoms of celebs wearing Juicy Couture. Lovley.
Lilly Pulitzer has launched a book called “Essentially Lilly.”
“Fashioning Fiction in Photography Since 1990” is at MoMA’s temporary Queens headquarters in Long Island City.
Helen Gurley Brown has released “Dear Pussycat: Mash Notes and Missives From the Desk of Cosmopolitan’s Legendary Editor” sharing 300 notes, and letters ‘I don’t think you can call somebody honey and you can’t call them darling, but you can be affectionate by calling them pussycat.” Meow
Andre Balazs is opening another hotel in New York that will be less expensive than The Standard, more like a hostel. (The SubStandard?) And will be very cheap with bunk beds.(crickey)
Gap is in negotiations to have Sarah Jessica Parker star in an upcoming ads
The Coen brothers’ remake of a 1955 comedy classic, The Lady Killers starring Tom Hanks will be screening at the Cannes film festival next month. Mike Moore’s entry this year is Fahrenheit 9/11, his indictment of the Bush administration for allegedly using the events of September 11 to push its own agenda. Shrek 2 will be screening and Irwin Winkler’s musical tribute to Cole Porter, De-Lovely will close the festival May 23.Can’t wait

http://www.realitytvworld.com
We are so over reality TV aren’t we? But if you want to know what happens before it’s even screened here why not go to this amazing website that has links and inside scoops on every reality show known to mankind? “One of its sites, SurvivorBlows.com, features the Web’s oldest continually-operating “Survivor” and “Big Brother” message boards, dating back to the shows’ first seasons. Other sites include FindTheMole.com, TheOsbournesSucks.com, TemptationIslandSucks.com, and how about LoveCruiseSinks.com, and BootCampBites.com? Hilarious.

http://www.foodtourist.com
Here is a great website if you are a foodie gourmet traveller and need to some inside goss on eating your way around the world (heaven!). Foodtourist.com is “dedicated to food lovers throughout the world who have embarked on the quest of searching out the best restaurants, the best food stores, the best wine merchants and the best food products! We share with you the experiences of our reviewers who have so far been in Europe, Australia, the USA and South East Asia and you won’t find lists of the world’s most expensive and well-known restaurants although some of them are certainly here”

“CBS’ decision to air photographs of Princess Diana in her last, dying moments outraged British prime minister Tony Blair but they didn’t do much in the way of ratings Wednesday” Reuters (Priorities.A bit of cleavage would have).
Rebecca Romijn-Stamos is hanging out with “very good friend” John Cusack.
Scarlett Johansson, Chloë Sevigny and Christina Riccii may be in the next Louis Vuitton campaign.
Helena Christensen will be the photographer for Harpers Bazaar at Fashion Week.
Kevin Spacey was knocked unconscious when “A kid asked could they call their mother and use my phone. It was such a good con, that I actually dialled the number myself and then handed [over] my phone. And this kid took off, I was so upset I ran after him. I tripped up over my dog, and ended up falling on to the street and hitting my head”. Bless
Gwyneth will give birth at their £1.5 million Belgravia home in May and has already had a special birthing pool installed for the event (honey it will still hurt).
Britney had her brother arrested by the (fake) FBI who tracked him down handcuffed him and dragged him into a waiting car; then took him to his surprise birthday party. (Toxic).(nutty)
Lucy Liu is planning to marry her writer boyfriend Zack Helm.
J.Lo and Marc Anthony were kissing and cuddling in the back row of his movie premiere in LA.
Becks shaved his hair (new hair: new girl?) and gave Posh a $1.8 million diamond for her 30th.
Sandra Bullock’s filming the sequel to “Miss Congeniality”.
Paris Hilton is doing a book. ”Paris suffers from ADD so advanced she can’t deal with reading through the book in progress, so she’s having someone read it to her over the phone. (We call it “being cracked out.”) Gawker
Paris jetted into Brisbane yesterday to try to launch her movie career.
Marilyn Manson has popped the question to artist Dita Von Teese.
Salman Rushtie married model Padma Lakshmi.
Adrien Brody s 31st birthday party in the NYC’s East Village was so noisy an annoyed neighbor threw eggs at the star-studded crowd…the egg tosser was ex Village People cowboy Randy Jones (egg on his face already)(Nutty)

Eurydice Street: A Place in Athens by Sofka Zinovieff
The Athens Olympics are around the corner so we may as well get in the Greek mood! And who can resist another armchair travel book even if it’s not about Tuscany? The writer Sofka Zinovieff was interviewed in the latest British Vogue and she sounds a glamour puss and this looks like a great book (not yet released it is on Amazon.co.uk). It’s about her life in Athens when she goes to live there with her expatriate Greek husband and two young daughters. “This book is a fresh, funny and inquiring account of her first year as an Athenian which turns out to be a process of Byzantine complexity. As the months go by, Sofka’s discovers how memories of Athens’ past haunt its present in its music, poetry and history, about the difficult art of catching a taxi, the importance of smoking, the unimportance of time-keeping, and how to get your Christmas piglet cooked at the baker’s.”

The Christmas List:
Mrs Newton by June Newton
This is the fabulous book released in March by June Newton as in Alice Springs, as in the late Helmut Newton’s Australian wife. It “ takes the reader on an extraordinary journey from her childhood in Australia, via work and travels with her husband, Helmut Newton, to life today in LA and Monaco. The photographs by and of Springs featured throughout the book—a wonderful contemporary mix of personal snapshots and professional portraits of creative figures including Yves Saint Laurent, Gore Vidal, Balthus, Robert Mapplethorpe, Brassai, Nicole Kidman, and Angelica Houston—illustrate the story of her life, in which the houses and apartments where she has lived stand as milestones. Her previously unpublished diary extracts and her new writing are lit up by gentle irony, disarming honesty, and a photographer’s eye for telling detail. Intensely personal and engaging, this book charts the journey through life of a remarkable 20th century woman.” from http://www.taschen.com. Even more interesting now that Helmut has gone to the great big studio in the sky

Economy:
Zomp Shoez: has some cool shoes in so check out the Simon Bay Italian black and red trim or white with mesh detail $300, the funky slouchy boots in brown suede $365, and the suede black, pink and brown 40’s suede peep toe shoes $300,Witchery: have the cutest floral, white and pink pyjama top $39 with matching satin drawstring pants $49, have very chic, black leather skirt $269, and a beautiful black leather jacket with hidden zips and pleats $399, and a black fitted Mod style fitted jersey ¾ coat $249.Just Jeans: don’t forget they have a great selection of seven jeans.( great fit)Dotti: have some quite chic cotton satine double breasted mini trench coats in black, brown and camel $129, and some pink Marc Jacobs style tweed coats (maybe a bit too cheap looking!) but $139.Portmans: have done a good knee length denim straight skirt with a little split at the front $69 and have reduced their trench to $139 from $179.Sportsgirl: have lots of outrageous candy colour 80’s stuff that is for the very young! It’s all a bit too retro for moi (sorry to say) so try the faux snakeskin coat $279, the brown tweed skirt with flower embroidery on corner $99, a good beaded black clutch $39 and some cute looking vintage style beaded purses $39,and I love their art deco style diamante earrings $24.Emporio Armani jewellery is now in David Jones so check out the cuffs, the pendants and rings in silver.

Business:
Nicola Finetti:has lots of new pieces in and the new winter collection is too too divine! Check out the red diamante trim dress with chiffon ruching $1400, a fab short pearlized leather trench $1450, The must have buy now is the stretch satin shell top with a raw edge trim and beading across it in either black or white or gold $220.There is a pearlized black biker jacket $1120 (also in Tan) a pretty ruched chiffon top with embroidered trim in black and grey and other colours $439. Papoucci: Have some gorgeous Coccinelle bags which are very reasonably priced. Check out the brown suede square $399, a fab black with buckles $695, a simple soft napa leather brown one $569 and you want the woven ones in suede and leather $ 845. Also they have the chicest suede ballet flats in all amazing colours by Cataner $344 and of course Tods in all sorts of styles but the high heels are the best with studs on the side $695. And scoop: Watch out for the Hogan shoes and bags arriving in May! Funkis: Have the label Fillippa K and you want the knit jersey tops and the 60’s print vintage dresses $330.Also remember prints are a huge fashion story so you want the Florence Broadhurst skirts here in brown and black and Funkis and Marimekko ones in fab colours from $145. Bulb: Have a great range of Tocca candles including a chic de la chic blue leather travel box with 3 pretty mini candles and its own matches $275 and check out all the fab vintage glomesh bags. Theodora & Martha: Have a fantastic range of Cacharel and you want the gorgeous tweed pink skirt with liberty lining and pockets $375,the pretty print skirt $290, a Sophia Loren style strawberry print dress $325,the blue tweed warp mini with the liberty lining $270, the polka dot halter top $220 (good prices!) and the divine chiffon floral dress with a knit trim band at $820 and the fab stripe cotton bags with leather trim from Brontibags $315. Max & Co: have a gorgeous classic black velvet and satin trim dress $650, an amazing shearling jacket $750, and coat/cardigan jacket with leather trim $595, and a cool leather burgundy clutch bag $300ish, and a classic pea coat $520.

First class
Cosmo Shoes have a whole new shipment of YSL shoes! Get in there with the black Amex! (Full Report next week)
Belinda Double Bay: Of course everything in here is quite beautiful but you will love the Alice Temperley dresses that have just arrived. Check out the sexy black lace one $2000, and the amazing beaded black one $2000. You want the Kaos bags made from vintage Kimono fabric in all different shapes from $160 and the ‘Velvet ‘T-shits are quite soft and great quality at $125.Also very cheap but chic is the Velvet sequin T’s $145. Yu will be pleased to know that Belinda is opening a Men’s store in Queens St and a store in Melbourne. Also rush into Belinda in the MLC centre the first week of May to buy up the 1st summer drop of all the imports like Lanvin. (Rush. I say Rush!)
Orson & Blake’s new shop at 78 Queen St Woollahra has lots of gorgeous things like the Miller Harris and Tocca candles and toiletries, and gorgeous Diane Von Furstenburg dresses. Check out the pretty candelabras, the books like In the Spirit of St Tropez, The Fornasetti plates, the beautiful soft cream and pastel striped blankets and the cute little watercolours by the artist Belinda Black.
Christensen Copenhagen: Ooh la la you want all the Missoni that was unpacked last week but half of it has gone! You will die for the fab dress in the window with a peacock print $ 2797 (buy 2!), also as a top ($2000 ish!) the stripe lurex dress $1695, the fabulous wrap stripe dress $675.You will love the big leather Luella bags, the little Joe camisoles $391, and the Sophia Shore cashmere cardigans $450 plus lots of divine Diane Von Furstenburg dresses and the Paul & Joe leather jackets as I have previously drooled over…..
Myer Bondi Junction with lots of designer goodies has opened and it looks great …..Stay turned for a full in depth FiFi report next week…

Poached salmon in lemon grass and lemon and orange juice

Here is a really quick but oh-so-magnifique dinner that takes no time at all. It’s basically poaching the salmon in some lemon juice, orange juice, lemon grass and wine by throwing it in the oven untill you watch the end of Queer Eye. In fact it’s so easy you can make this while watching TV AND reading the Vanity Fair…

You need for 4
4 Salmon fillets
2 cup or so of orange juice (yes. Don’t be scared. It adds a bit of zing)
2 cup of Lemon juice (or Lime juice)
2 cups of white wine
2 cups of chicken stock
I white onion
3 garlics chopped finely
2 to 3 lemon grass stalks chopped finely
sel et poivre
Add some lime leaves if you so desire

·Mix all the ingredients (except the salmon). Being careful that when you pour 2 cups of white wine you pour yourself a big fat glass of wine too.
·Pop in a baking dish and heat up and cook for about 5 mins till it’s nearly boiling.
·Are you ready to eat? Because you will be in 5 more minutes so hop to it and set the table.
·Throw the salmon in the poaching conglomeration making sure the salmon is all covered. Add more lemon juice or wine if you need to (and your own glass too). Cook it till it’s flaky and tender. Or to your liking. Which is always handy because you’re eating it.
·Voila!
·You might serve this with asparagus, some rice or little boiled potatoes.
·Ain’t it easy? Took longer to write it than cook it and even less calories to eat it. Yum.

The Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind by Charlie Kaufman

One reviewer describes Charlie Kaufman films as “the very orgy of inventiveness” And we all love an orgy don’t we? This is a fantastic movie.If you loved ‘Being John Malkovich’ and you loved ‘Adaptation’ then you will go crazy in love for this new movie written by Charlie Kaufman.The title is ‘from a line by Alexander Pope, the 18th-century neoclassicist poet whose witty, polished heroic couplets were his way of imposing order on a world ” And that’s just the kooky title! The story is even more creative, about a couple (Jim Carrey and Kate Winslet) who undergo a wierd,surrealist procedure to erase each other from their memories when their relationship turns sour. Good movie making is making you believe the craziest things and this movie is crazy! And you believe it. So clever, so well written, so imaginative and so well edited that it goes backwards and forwards in time before you even realize it and really keeps you on your toes. So pay attention. We like a movie that presumes the audience is brainy (What a relief.) And we love a movie about love. Kate Winslet is AMAZING and has all the mannerisms of a neurotic American girl and her accent is faultless, Jim Carrey is great and looks even a bit spunky -no really- with a cool hair cut. The styling of the movie is sooo groovy in that geeky, daggy way, the photography is fabulous. Need I go on? Oh and I loved the moral to the story .No I’m not telling you. You can see for yourself.
(Nutty is the word du jour)

I do enjoy receiving fifi report and Friday’s are just not the same without them.
(Sorry it’s so late it’s nearly saturday morning)
“Thank you FiFi, the report is always a fantastic, informative
read…..and for keeping me in the loop”
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