“She taught me that if you have something bad to say, don’t put it in writing.” Leonard lauder on Estee. (oops I’m in trouble)
“It took them 12 months to decide.They would test me then I wouldn’t hear from them for weeks then they’d ring and say you have to go to LA to see the director, to London to meet the producer, by the end I was over it ‘ Diane Kruger in her role in Troy (OZ Vogue)
“It was apparent as soon as she walked into the room that the search was over” Director Wolfgang Peterson on Diane kruger in US Vogue ( oh really?)
“Never get divorced. The only thing that changes about a man is his face.’” Estee Lauder’s advice to Barbara Walters (she didn’t take it)
“In Hollywood that’s a lifetime so we’re pretty pleased. I don’t just love Brad, I love being with him. Brad and I are still together and happy.”Jennifer Aniston.
“I’m naked all the time at home,” Brad Pitt (Happy.Who cares if his face changes?).
“Jen and I are in the negotiation phase, we’re still practicing”. Brad Pitt on children.
“I’m still up for having fun, but I love the idea of the garden fence with children behind it” Brad Pitt likes the idea then putting it into practice.
“We were making out or having sex or something, which I think is very unsanitary,” Scarlett Johansen on doing it in a lift with Benicio at the Chateau Marmont. “How they managed it in the Chateau Marmont lift is a miracle. Their lifts are old wooden ones. They’re small and creak when they are moving. I hate having to use them – let alone have sex in one.” Glamour (A miracle. that’s what Benicio said too)
“We have a lot of experience on the red carpet and fashion shows. We might as well have our own lines.” Beyonce on why she has her own clothing label(such experience)
“I don’t sketch; I can’t draw or anything like that but I have a design team and they come up with ideas. I approve or disapprove.” Eve (now that’s real talent)
“You don’t need qualifications to be a politician, do you? Look at Arnold Schwarzenegger. Because I am a model, people have trouble realizing that I am serious” Model Karmen Cass on going into politics (And Arnie is taken very seriously)
“I’m a philosophical vegetarian, but I do like to wear fur,” says cosmetics company Face Stockholm as she strokes the front of the espresso-colored sheared-mink sweater she calls one of her “portable pets.” “Studies show that your blood pressure drops if you pet an animal, but I can’t take my big shepherd everywhere with me. So I have to wear clothes that are tactile.” wwd (so very philosophical portable pets)

In this fashion season of glitter, embellishment and all things opulent it’s very obvious that big diamond anything are The Must Have piece. And earrings take the pick. Not only will they razz up all your daggy pieces from last year in a thrice but most importantly distract everyone from the same old thing you keep wearing. And here’s the scoop all that glitters isn’t expensive. So if you can’t be bothered going into the family Vault for the heirloom earrings nick into Photias Bros instead for the most fabulous selection of the cheapest and best diamante dangle/spangle/Bling Bling earrings this side of the J.Lo. How does $20 sound for a gorgeous art deco style pair ? Cheap but chic. And while you’re there grab some feather boas (seen everywhere this season) or lots of sew on sparkly sequin bits and bobs, fake enamel brightly coloured cuffs $8 or groovy diamante brooches $15.

Photios Bros, 66 Druit St Sydney 9267 1428

When you fall in love it’s always torture having to leave those you love behind and not take them with you. So here’s a solution: Take photos of your loved ones and carry the shots in gorgeous black leather, specially designed envelopes (with white stitching). Small enough to throw in your bag next to your Hermes wallet. So next time you have to leave your new outrageously fabulous red Birken tucked up in it’s bag all alone in your wardrobe, just quickly take a snap and whenever you’re pining for it, whip out the photos and that loving feeling will come flooding back. (works with shoes too)
Black leather photo envelopes $19 from David Jones

If you are the kind of girl who likes to do her nails at home yourself while you are idly flicking through magazines (don’t be shocked, some people do) then you should know about the perfect nail colour from Christina Fitzgerald. It’s called Annie and it is almost white but has a teeny wee bit of pink in it which means that it looks natural but not too natural so that the end result looks, well, um natural. It is nice and shiny, seems long lasting plus it doesn’t seem to chip. Designed in Australia and made in France her polishes are named after life long clients who are life long friends. Sweet.

Christina Fitzgerald Nail Polish “Annie” $22 from major department stores.

YSL’s new ads are based on the romantic Chinese film In The Mood For Love, and feature hot Australian model Gemma Ward in satin and fur. Uk Vogue.
Sarah Jessica Parker hosted the New York City Ballet gala which celebrated the centennial of George Balanchine.
Miuccia Prada’s Fondazione Prada plans to host a miniature version of the Tribeca Film Festival in Milan in October.
Jean Paul Gaultier is to mount an exhibition on June 6 at the Cartier Foundation called “Pain Couture,” of ephemeral designs using bread instead of taffeta or muslin. (Was that Pain or pain?).
Giorgio Armani’s retrospective celebrating his career is now in Rome at the Baths of Diocletian, the largest complex of thermal baths in the ancient Roman world.
O at Home is Oprah Winfrey’s new home magazine.
Beginning with the September issue Martha Stewart Living said it would downplay Stewart’s name and focus on the name Living as the brand label. (living in jail)
The Cannes film festival has begun it’s annual festival ( see Sophia Coppola and Quentin Tarantino together as a couple).
A painting by Jackson Pollock was sold for $20 setting a world auction record for the postwar US artist.
Los Angeles Times and The New York Times are working on major stories about whether Vanity Fair editor Graydon Carter is using his close ties to Hollywood to benefit financially ( They’re calling it Graydongate).
A Helmut Newton exhibition will be on in Berlin’s Museum of fotgrafie in June called Us and Them, a series of self portraits and celebrity shots.
The Prague international spring Music festival is on till June 3
And if you are in Spain don’t miss the arts festival Forum Barcelona (from May to sept) with dance, theatre and an exhibition called Picasso: War and Peace.

http://www.mylastemail.com
Yes it is very morbid and kooky but “Mylastemail.com is a unique online service, which allows you to leave messages for those you care about – to be emailed after your death.It is important to think now about what happens when you don’t have the time to say goodbye properly to family and friends” Don’t know why you can’t just write a will or leave it on a hotmail address…

http://www.elleonline.com.au
No this is not the magazine elle but the website of the groovy and very chic boutique in Perth called Elle. Check out the Marni, Stella McCartney,Rick Owens and Galliano all available online.Most don’t have a price and you have to email a sales enquiry instead of getting a cart and loading it up ! but its still great to drool even if you don’t buy..

Brad Pitt is supposed to be having an affair with Angelina Jolie on the set of their movie Mr & Mrs Smith.
Jennifer Aniston is to carry the Olympic torch for a part of its run up to the Olympics. (holding the torch)
Marilyn Manson is to play Jesus Christ in a film Diamond Dead, “It’s a dark comedy about a rock band that makes a deal with the devil and Jesus smokes pot.”F2 ( hilarious dark comedy)
Heath and Naomi are not broken up ( the lies that people print. Honestly)
Giorgio Armani has been forced to withdraw the latest ad for his Junior childrenswear range after it was judged to potentially “encourage paedophiles”
Christie Brinkley is suing the National Enquirer claiming it has run false stories about her and reporting that she had suffered a nervous breakdown as well as delusions and fits of paranoia.(very paranoid to sue).
Matthew Vaughn’s film debut, “Layer Cake,” stars Sienna Miller and was written by Guy Ritchie.
Paris Hilton and Nicole Ritchie have had a string of arguments while filming the second series of The Simple Life and producers doing crafty editing to make it look like they’re still best friends. (isn’t that called great TV?)
“Five bucks to anyone who can tell the whole class in great, salacious detail why Martha Stewart was having a meeting in the offices of reality show king and Survivor exec Mark Burnett” (now that’s going to be great TV). From Gawker
J.Lo is rumoured to be engaged again to Marc Anthony.
Bugger. George Clooney has rekindled his relationship with MTA Lisa Snowdon. They were seen having dinner in Amsterdam, where George is filming Ocean’s Twelve, before kissing passionately on the taxi ride back to their hotel. (passionately? was someone in the taxi?)
Actress Ellen Barkin and Ron Perelman are back together again ( he owns Revlon but she has been listening to Estee lauder)
Keifer Sutherland has filed for divorce from his wife.
Billionaire investor George and his wife Susan Soros have finally officially separated (he doesn’t need to listen to Estee)
Charlize Theron’s friends say she and Stuart Townsend are secretly planning a summer wedding ( secretly their friends tell the press).

Little Black Book of Stories By A.S. Byatt
If you loved Possession and any book by A.S Byatt then you will love her new book which has been getting rave reviews.”The haunting new work she has gathered in ”Little Black Book of Stories” bears all the hallmarks of her style. Carefully constructed, highly allusive, containing fictional artists and artfully faked ”fiction” within the fiction, these five stories are not just meditations on art and its place in the world; they are also thrilling Gothic tales in their own right. A delight for Byatt’s longtime readers, they offer a rebuke to her critics: Byatt has the sheer narrative skill to raise the hairs on the back of your neck and make your pulse race. In this fine and memorable collection, she attains a near perfect balance between low and high, body and mind, the Thing and its significance.” The New York Times says so…$39.95 from Major book sellers

Christmas List:
Modern Glamour: The Art of Unexpected Style by Kelly Wearstler
I am always seeing this Kelly Wearstler, the groovy founder of the LA “architectural interior design” firm KWID (who also worked as a Hollywood set designer) turning up in all sorts of magazines from Vogue to Elle deco. And I’ve been dying to clap eyes on her book since reading about it in all said magazines. And I must say the interiors are pretty cool but it’s a bit of a worry that she’s put herself on the cover looking all too fabulous .I thought it was about her work ( maybe it is: her work in plastic) Whatever the cover , this book is full of fabulous, luscious, groovy photos of amazing places that we all want to live in (and will soon). Check out “ her unusual and kaleidoscopic style, which graces such famous California hotels as the Viceroy, Estella and Maison 140 and houses she’s designed for Ben Stiller and Jeanne Tripplehorn”
$59 from major Booksellers and David Jones

Economy:
Tom Ford I’ m cursing you. Seasons on from its inaugural Gucci collection it seems that pale smokey pink is still haunting us. It’s everywhere.Please explain who is wearing it? Who is buying it? Must be why it’s everywhere. And what fashion planet do 50’s sweaters with big collars came from?? Not the fashion planet I know and love. No wonder all I can think about is gorgeous bright stripe Missoni or a embellished bag. Remember if I don’t like it I don’t write it which is why some shops are never reported. I go in as my duty to the FiFi readers and then I walk out. So onto shopping…
Dossier: in Double bay have jelly kelly’s for $169. We are over them but these are in camel or black and they look pretty good. Witchery: Don’t forget the fab Balenciaga style distressed leather bags with brass studs $139, the gorgeous sequin scarves in green pink and black with cut out strips so you can wear them as tops $79,perfect for this seasons razzle dazzle. The elastic back knee high boots are good for fatttie calves, $259 and have a low kitten heel in black or brown. And I love the black patent round toe heels $139 and the black leather jacket with pleat front $399 as I’ve reported weeks ago. Sportscraft: have a cool tweed A line skirt $146 and quite a nice coat $499. Esprit: have a cool black satin high collar cut away shirt ( secretary/Prada style) with a chic elastic bottom $99, and they have some great winter whites which look great in the window but who wears it? The hand knitted white poncho is cool $89.Portmans have cotton stretch rib polonecks in every colour $39 but I think the Country Road ones in wool are better. They also have a cool cable knit grey or white sweaters which short and tight $169 and a lot of suits if you are looking for work clothes.Ojay have a cool satin wrap top $149,Veronika Maine has the best knits to wear under suits for work like shell tops $129. Kookai have a leaf print wrap DVF style dress $179 and lace trim top in the same pink or black floral print $109, grey maille T shirt singlet dress $89 and an imitation of the imitation of Christ jagged, edge grey skirt (very Chloe Sevigny) $99. Sportsgirl are doing the vintage boho look well , the advertsing looks better than the real thing (it’s for the young). Check out the gold silk 50’s coat $249. Seduce: looks a bit different from everything out there - just- like the pink or black lurex wrap DVF copy dress $159, sexy mama in bronze. Check out the brown cotton racer back singlet with sequins on the back (could be the front?) $119, and a black version with bronze sequins and there is a drape jersey floral off the shoulder top $159 ( a bit Gucci if you squint).Levis have some really simple zip tight track tops without any rubbish on them $79 and some great dark denim skinny leg jeans $120.
Business:
Saba: is looking good these days: I like the red or purple empire top $245, the black floral print velvet skirt ( oops with a asymetrical hem) $245, it brightens up a black wardrobe like the wool gold or black sequins shrugs $285, and you want the sheer black twenties with gold beading dress $895. Morrissey: The pleated 50’s shirt dress with belt is the go in satin $299, or the red or black jersey plunging neck halter sex bomb dress $249 and get into the white fake fur chubby or the mushroom belted trench $599.
Voi: checked this place out for cheap but chic designer bargains but there is not much there though you might like the Helmut Lang cotton denim jackets in different colours white, black, camel, grey or pink $90.There are business suits galore from D&G or Emporio Armani around $600.
A/X Armani Exchange: have a very glitzy but cool knit halter top covered in sequins and dangling bits and pieces $129, a cute shrunken jacket in cotton canvas $189, check out the black ‘juicy couture’track top with addidas stripes $129, white fur chubby jacket $839, and the black jersey drape top $139.Lisa Ho: has a fab red and pink beaded and sequin scarf $275, amazing gold sequin flapper dress $1835, a possum fur chubby is cool dyed red $935, and you will live in the black and white tweed trench $878, and a cami style lace trim top $370, a pretty pucci print yellow and browns peasnt top $475 and don’t go anywhere else for your logie dress! Jigsaw: have an ideal little singlet with a little bit of glitter along the neck that you can slip under your work jacket $139 and a perfect white long sleeve T $145 and looks like Andrea Rembeck is opening in the Strand Arcade. Longchamps: Have lots of next summer bags all gorgeous.Buy the totes in browns and candy stripe $299,there is a fab canvas tote in brown with green and blue big circles $299, you want the really big expandable totes that are the size of a suitcase but fold up in great colours $269 and the beach tote $299 and if you’re feeling adventurous how about the pretty Japanese style blue floral print bags $499, a fab classic square bag $529 and don’t forget the nylon slouch bags to wear when you’re travelling $269.There is prettiest glass votives covered in red camel, blue leather $85 and espadrilles are here too $129.
First:
Evelyn Miles: have some fab Sergio Rossi loafers in red, green, white and orange $678, fab Barbara Bui T bar silver and pink trim 40’s shoes $798, and the shoe you HAVE to have are the Michel Perry pink, red patchwork suede sling backs $998 or the boots, and don’t forget the secret back sale room and the Manolos on sale (as reported last week) $599. Prada:but wait there’s more!Yes more of the famous postcard global tourist collection has come in. Please go in just to check out what everyone will be copying next season!You will find the sheer Perspex postcard print tote $1600,the divine stud camel bag with chain strap $1760, the gorgeous multi coloured patent leather T bar mules $560 or flats $490 and I think you should buy the postcard print canvas bag only $710, the nylon totes with leather trim in bright colours like blue or green $800 and you will love the postcard hat $410, and the red patent thin belt is a must have $320.
EXRE: Have just un packed some fabulous ‘Giselle’ Luella bags which are or should I say were the bags du jour in fashion land last season (you want the Louis Vuitton gold or jewelled Mui Mui one now) but hey I still NEED these ones in green, tan and chocolate $1400. There are also amazing beaded Chloe bracelet bags $2125 and the white or black Chloe ‘glomesh’ slouch are an incredible $2868 ( buy 2).While you’re there check out the Paco Rabanne sixties bags which are very ….sixties Paco Rabanne with chain mail trims $1935 and the faaaaabulous Desmo red python bags $1900!
Gucci: have the baby suede logo shoes in again $399!

Pear Crumble

Need some old fashioned comfort food? Something to warm the heart and not the hips? Oh well. Impossible. Nothing exists that could possibly taste delicious and not be fattening.But surely this little crumble from Jill Dupleix ‘s Old Food (with the secret ingredient of freshly whizzed ground almonds) can’t be sooo bad for you. Except of course when you serve it with lashings of King Island cream….

You need about 6 pears or rhubarb or apples.
Vanilla bean
Squeeze of a Lemon or 2
A ¼ preserved lemon rinsed and chopped
Sprinkle of sugar

Crumble topping:
150g plain Jane old boring flour
½ teasp of cinnamon
75 gm of unsalted butter
75g brown sugar
2 tablespoons of ground almonds

·Heat oven to 190
·Chop and peel the fruit, let’s say they’re pears. Pop in a bowl with a squeeze of a couple of lemons, a bit of preserved lemon in there too, sprinkle with some sugar and the seeds of the vanilla bean. Let them all marinate happily together while you whip up the crumble topping:
·Whiz up a couple of tablespoons of fresh almonds in the whizzer so they’re ground but still a bit crunchy and roughly chopped.
·Sift the flour (if you can be bothered) and the cinnamon
·I’m thinking this might be a good time to pop the pears on a bit of heat and lightly stew them for about 10 mins so they are soft and gooey. Take out the vanilla seeds if you so desire.
·Ok now go back to the crumble while the pears are doing their thing, simmering away ( like Brad Pitt in Troy: simmering) (turn it down that’s too too hot)
·Cut the butter up into the plain Jane flour and rub it lightly in. Make sure that you keep some lumps because that’s what a crumble is all about: crunchy lumps non? Talk about sticky fingers. Better just try the crumble. Yum
·Now mix in the crunchy almonds and the brown sugar and give it a mix. Voila the crumble topping.
·Oh dear did you forget about the pears? Turn them off and let them cool off. (they’re probably grumpy at being ignored)
·Toss the cool, happy little juicy pears in a oven dish and cover with the exquisite crumble topping.
·Cook till the crumble is golden and brown on the top and those pears are a bubbling away like nobodies business.
·Serve with lashing of cream and blindfold your friends to try and guess all your secret ingredients!
·Another winner!

TROY directed by Wolfgang Peters (The Perfect storm) with Brad Pitt and Orlando Bloom, Peter O’Toole and Eric Bana and all sorts of spunky men in skirts!
Rose Byrne is a lucky girl. Filming the love scene with Brad Pitt must have so hard (hopefully). She said he was a good kisser and he looks like he is. Just a pity about his acting. Yes this film is very loosely based on Homer’s epic poem The Iliad and I say loosely because Homer must have turning in his grave. Did Wolfgang read the same poem I did? In this version the Gods just don’t get any respect (except ironically Brad Pitt) and I’m sure there are thousands of other historical inaccuracies. But hey who cares. This is Hollywood and this is a great big,fat blockbuster of a movie and I say bring it. One part Gladiator, it lacks the fabulous touch of Ridley Scott and one part Lord of the Rings but without the incredible story by Tolkien. The battle scenes are amazingly directed (there is so much gory blood n’guts that I’m amazed no one was killed!) but Wolfgang just forgot to direct the actors.Oops.It really is sort of cheesy like Epic theatre. Ok not stinky blue cheese smelly but a bit like Parmesan, so it might just get better as it ages. Peter O’Toole is fantastic and so is Rose Byrne but Brad just stares into the distance, pouts and glowers and has lines like “It’s too early in the day for killing princes”. Orlando Bloom’s Paris is cute but we all chuckled when he says to Helen” Run away with me, we’ll live off the land. I’ll kill deer and rabbits”! Bless. Some of the sword fight scenes were so over the top I just burst out laughing. Now for the good news. The costumes are amazing, the sets so cool (all dark wenge wood, shag pile and chandeliers) and the sheer enormity of the battle scenes are just incredible. I think these guys had fun making this movie and it was fun to watch. There is nothing like seeing a big spunky, buffed and oh so handsome Brad Pitt in a leather skirt. it makes sitting still in the dark for 2 hours and 45 mins worth while and isn’t that what Hollywood is all about?

US Vogue May: Yes it is confusing having Nicole on the cover of both US and Oz vogues. This is a fab issue as usual. Read about Aussie girl Emma Fletcher opening up a store in New York called lyell,see Nicole posing for Irving Penn and the amazing shoot by Annie Leibovitz based on Fragonard paintings.
US Harpers May: has a stunning photoshopped Courteny Cox on the cover who looks fab for 40 anyway. Check out Trudie Styler life in pictures (she’s snogged Tom Ford) and was so in love with Sting, read about the trenchcoat modeled by Charlotte Rampling and Charlotte Gainsbourg, and look at the weird 70’s cartoon layout of the Couture modeled by Gemma Ward. And there’s a story on Melbournian designer Martin Grant with Cate Blanchett.
Conde Nast traveler UK May; has the top 50 coolest hotels in the world and yes The FiFi Report has reported on at least half of them ( who goes to Warsaw anyway) and read about the insiders guide to Paris and 10 great villas to rent in Spain.

“You are sooooo funny I am happily addicted thx”
“What a relief to find a fifi who can get through all the rubbish to find the real rubbish in all gossip out there and then find really great shopping too”
“Fifi how can I wait till every Friday to have a laugh”
“The idea of economy business and first is so great Thanks! it makes my underconfident fashion forays just maybe a bit easier ”
“where is the FiFi recipes?..I love my FiFi recipes??” (Opps. Got left off last week which is why you got 2 Reports)