“He asked her what the last thing she’d had in her mouth was and got the reply: “A dildo.” Britney to Popworld.( I never.Not our Britney).
“I thought her answer would be something like chicken escalope,” Popworld’s Simon Amstell
“It was hilarious. No-one could believe it. She simply whipped off her tiny T-shirt, even though she wasn’t wearing a bra, and just put the shirt on. Men were gasping!” A witness watching Paris Hilton trying something on in the middle of a shop.(gasping!)
“She’s bracing herself for further embarrassment. Nick and Paris loved making sex tapes.” A friend or ex friend of Paris Hilton on her house being robbed ( Chicken escalope anyone?)
“I guess I carry some of my mum’s spirit with me, and perhaps African-American audiences can sense that bottomless African sadness in me.” Thandie Newton.(Bottomless? Not the right word).
“They open and close electronically, are heated and they wash and dry your bottom,” the 5 Japanese electric toilets in Richard Branson’s new apartment in Sydney (bottomless happiness).
“We’ve been best friends forever, that’s what’s so annoying, the way the press is reporting it like we just up and went to Vegas.” Nicky Hilton on getting married in Vegas. (You did Nicky) Immediately following the 2 a.m nuptials, the party returned to Los Angeles by private jet. “It’s really no big deal,” said Hilton. (No big deal. This is a serious marriage. Annoying.)
“He’s a stay-at-home boy. I’m an out-on-the-town girl, I’m sad, but I want to make the most of every moment. It couldn’t last.” Kirsten Dunst on Jake being boring (I’ll stay at home with you)( Chicken escalope ?)
“This obsession with plastic surgery is an epidemic. It’s lunacy! These women have had their faces rebuilt and they look terrible. It’s going to backfire at some point; sadly somebody famous and young is going to have to die on the table.” Jaimie Lee Curtis.(That’s not true.I think Kylie looks great.)
“I’m always a cynical, sceptical person, and I think that women and their vulnerabilities are played on in the cosmetic industry. I do think women are encouraged to be terrified of aging,” Cate Blanchett. Easy for you to say it’s a communist plot, try looking at Dannii. Before. Terrifying.

You can never have enough shoes, bags and books. It’s true. And books are just like accessories, it should be all about classics. That’s why you should nick into Angus & Robertson for their sale on their paperback classics. You can buy anything from Sense and Sensibility to Charles Dickens to Moby Dick. And buy up big, they are only $4.95 and if you buy 2 you get 20% off. At that price you don’t even have to read them.

Paperback Classics $4.95 from Angus and Robertson

This season, it is all about embellishment but not just in the gossip and wardrobe departments! Now you can get a bit of bling at home too. Empire have some gorgeous clear crystal napkin rings that are too chic and will do wonders for that Ikea dining table table. Dress it up or dress it down, they’ll go day into evening and the best accessory for eating I’ve seen. Well apart from a wine glass.
Lead Crystal napkin rings from Empire $14.95

You’ve got to love a cosmetic company that has a moisturizer called ‘Hope and a Prayer’, a toner called ‘Hope in a Bottle’, and a night cream called ‘Hope is not enough’. But you can do more than hope when you use their fantastic exfoliater called ‘Greatest Love’. How could you resist rubbing your greatest love on your face? We can all have hope. Especially when it makes your skin soft and gorgeous with a microdermabrading…

Philosophy Greatest Love $55 from Mecca Cosmetica.

The Edinburgh Festival is on until Sept 5 http://www.eif.co.uk.
Blue Star jets are introducing an Air Salon on private flights with massages, manicures and botox injections.( frozen in time).
Next time you’re in The Bahamas stay at The One and Only Ocean club. I insist. http://www.oneandonlyresorts.com.
Easy jet now have not only EasyJet and Easycar but are starting up Easy Hotel with their first in London at US$10 a night http://www.easyhotel.com/
Here’s a great idea, next time you are in the South of France have a holiday in a tent, a very snazzy luxury Mongolian tent by a river in the Languedoc, called Mille Etoiles, Try http://www.canvaschic.com Or instead stay at the fabulous low key but very gorgeous B&B an hour from St Tropez at http://www.terrasse-provence.com, it’s 90 euros a night double. I like the swimming pool.
Juicy Couture has managed to snag US Vogue accessories director Michelle Sanders as its new vice president and fashion director.
Gianni Agnelli’s grandson and Fiat heir John Philip Elkann is tying the knot with Lavinia Borromeo Arese Taverna, a member of an aristocratic family dating back as far as the 14th century. The two are set to wed Sept. 4 in a very private chapel ceremony on Isola Madre on Lago Maggiore.WWD
American Express Publishing has been working on Centurion, a new magazine for its black Amex cardholders, who pay a hefty $2,500 annual membership fee for the privilege. The cover was designed by Tomas Maier from Bottega Veneta.
H&M Magazine is slated to drop next week in 20 countries. Besides numerous fashion layouts by top European photographers and stylists — who, incidentally, mix in their favorite clothes with H&M pieces — it contains articles on interior design and in-the-know eateries in Milan.WWD
A few months after illustrating the latest Larousse dictionary, Christian Lacroix will work with the newspaper Liberation. The French Daily will publish a 500-page almanac compiling articles from the past 30 years and Lacroix will oversee layout and add his signature illustrations.
Follow Bizet’s Opera of Carmen through the streets of Seville in Spain from 2 to 12 Sept . The Opera has never been staged here at the original dramatic surroundings.Go to http://www.carmeninseville.com. Cool.

http://www.dieseldreams.com/launch.html
This is so arty farty but if you have time it’s great to watch. Diesel have created a ‘dreams site’ : “a Freudian trip through the virtual dream worlds of thirty video artists from seventeen countries, exploring the understanding of human desire and thought, resulting in revolutionary unraveling of the mysteries of the unconscious” Yes Arty. There are 30 mini-films which are all pretty kooky especially the last one from Bady Minck…

http://www.parispersonalshopper.com
This is a stylish website and a dream come true. A personal guided shopping tour of Paris. Of course, it is for American shoppers: who else would “dream of setting off on a Parisian fashion getaway, but are apprehensive about navigating the streets of style on your own?” Hello? The only person apprehensive is my accountant. I have no sense of direction and that’s never stopped me shopping.
Trip fees begin at US$1500 per day, per person. Bring it on. Book 2 weeks!

P.Diddy was booed off stage twice last week in Ibiza, by unimpressed clubbers. (Boo)
Britney Spears has not called off her engagement, despite rumours to the contrary that Kevin and Britney had cancelled their nuptials following a row on the set of Britney’s perfume advert.
Britney Spears mother has put an end to Britney and Kevin’s plans for a wedding morning tattoo session.(Boo) She halted the plans, insisting that the marriage should be traditional - and that means the bride not seeing the groom in the morning. (thought it was the tattoos) (boo)
Britney Spears and her fiancé Kevin are rumoured to be taking over Jessica Simpson and Nick Lachey’s Newlyweds show. (Their life already IS a reality TV show)
Nicky Hilton had an ‘impromptu wedding at a Las Vegas Wedding Chapel to Todd Meister (Nicky Hilton Married In Freak Wedding Accident)
Paris Hilton has been reunited with her pet Chihuahua, Tinkerbell (huge news).
Diane Lane married Josh Brolin (Unfaithful?)
Tom Cruise ‘s new movie ‘War of the Worlds’ directed by Steven Spielberg, and is rumored to be the most expensive ever to be made.
Kylie Minogue is ready “ to hang up her hotpants”, according to Glamour and devote her time to raising a family with boyfriend Olivier (the love rat) ( no more chicken escalope)
Elizabeth Hurley is launching her own lingerie line. It will feature an ‘invisible’ pair of knickers and bra designed to be worn with the skimpiest of clothes. (Original)
Keanu Reeves has proposed to his actress girlfriend Autumn Macintosh. “ Keanu Reeves is reportedly engaged to a woman who can tolerate his blank stares” ( gawker.)
Gwyneth Paltrow’s next movie will be “Running With Scissors” , the true story of a boy whose mentally ill mother gave him away to be raised by her bizarre psychiatrist.
After 2 years of refusing to talk to each other, Kate Moss and Jade Jagger have become friends again. They threw a “riotous” party in Ibiza to celebrate it. Kate fell out with Jagger after sleeping with her boy friend, Dan Macmillan,( Boo) Jade responded by sending Moss a diamond necklace which spelled out the word “Slag” (Hoo).
John Galliano has launched a line of contact lenses that feature circles of glitter, gold or black to outline the iris called Dior Eyes.
Madame Tussaud’s has upgraded their waxwork of Brad Pitt to include a bare chest ready for the stroking, which is warm to the touch, It already has a pinchable bottom (Happiness).

Marie Antoinette: The Journey by Antonia Fraser
Sofia Coppola’s next movie is going to be a stylized version of the story of Marie Antioinette and her life with Louis XV1 starring Kirsten Dunst “I’ve always loved the story of Marie-Antoinette and the decadence of Versailles on the brink of revolution,” said Coppola, “and the fact she was just a teenager when circumstances forced her to play a significant role in history.”. So if it’s good enough for Sofia it’s good enough for me. Time to start reading the book. The movie will start filming in February so if you start now you might finish Antonia Fraser’s book by then. She is a fantastic writer, if you like historical biographies and this one written in 2002 is no exception. But it’s not a happy story, remember they both lost their heads during the French Revolution. (And she didn’t say ‘let me eat cake’ she said ‘let them eat Brioche’).

The Christmas List:
The Real Greek at Home by Theodore Kyriakou and Charles Campion
Here’s something to get you into the Olympic spirit. I say if you’re not doing any sport you may as well eat. So here’s a great cook book to get you in the mood. Theodore has a restaurant in London called The Real Greek and a groovy Souvlaki bar in Clerkenwell so he must be cool. This book has gorgeous photography, great layout and it reminds me a bit of the look of The River Café cook books and best of all you want to cook all the food. Theodore says it’s a cookbook as well as a memoir.
$49 at major booksellers

Economy:
Just Jeans; have a cute little halter top in a smoky pink $59, retro print pleated skirts $69 but in pastels, so you might like the pastel stripe skirts instead $69. ZU: have Miss Sixty shoes but they are all trainers very groovy about $265, in red and grey and white or some funky gold ones. Check out the cool Sachi rip off Sergio Rossi flat mules with a silver ring detail $100 and fake Pucci print pink sling backs $130. Cue; have a fab tan belt, quite wide with white stitching and a chic big ring buckle $79 and there is a black Louis Vuitton style stud bag $239.Alos you might like the handy, cute basic paneled classic cap sleeve top $89 (with a key hole so not so basic!). Nine west: have outrageous 40’s style leopard print shoes with diamante brooch $149 and fake croc bags, a bit cheap looking $89 in green. Target: Have some cool, very decent bikinis with a tortoiseshell ring detail for an outrageous $24 per top or bottom, they come in white and choc and red and black. Oh, and that bloody pink too. You might like the boy leg or the bikini bottom. Also there is fab tankini halter tops too, plus it looks like there is 20% off as well. And they have done a black or camel YSL style pencil skirt in cotton satine with a front pleat, belt loops and buttons $34!! FCUK; Have more retro print skirts and some cool T shirts with all sorts of FCUK over them $39.There is an out there white skirt with big bright pink embroidery sequins and some cool pull on canvas hats with white stitching $39. Sportsgirl: Have a few skirts with appliqué, very Easton Pearson. Check out the denim one with big flowers $79 or the white with pink flowers. They have also have done a collection called Vintage modern: very fifties. You might like the Prada style cardigan with pearls and beading $149 and the 50’s sheath dress in a vintage, brown, silk print $169 and the drop glam diamante earrings $34.Don’t forget the cream,with brown stitching, very 70’s trench coat now $199. Witchery: have so much pink but check out the brown linen blazer with a knit trim $149, and they have more of the fab Mui Mui copy 40’s satin open toe heels with a brooch $189. Check out the long sleeve white T with a grey short sleeve over it $39, the dark denim trousers with side pockets $129 and the Prada esque camel short cardigan with pearl and bead trim $129.

Business:
David Lawrence: have some chic little coloured car coat trenches in pink and green and blue $275 and light blue, belted trench and of course a classic stone one too and check out the classic,handy, dark denim paneled A line skirt $129.Country Road; have a white T shirt with a good scoop neck that is not wide (so it gives you a thin neck) $49 and there is a cool silver/bronze Jil Sander/Prada? Style skirt $249 (knee length and a side pleat). Check out their long sleeve brown top with a T shirt under it $99 and the Scanlanesque shell tops with 2 layers $99.There is also a cool scarf that has vertical stripes (not Missoni style) $89 and a very chic white shirt with 5 pearl buttons on the cuff $110. Bettina Liano is so out there this season, she’s definitely got the Hilton sisters in mind not very Mebourne dressing at all : There is a very mini white denim shorts $159 and short shorts $129 and very narrow Capri jeans $220. Zimmerman:have a few new pieces in but are still on sale. New in is a very pretty diamond print chiffon floaty wrap dress $600! with a thin ribbon belt, and a matching batwing top $495 plus a very groovy red and blue stripe lycra top $222. Mimco: You want their diamante jeweled brooches in lots of colours $80. David Jones: Have lots of new bags in from Burberry: check out the drawstring black one $1150 and some tote ones $1350 and you might like the big white or black bag with pockets and silver hardware $775 from Coccinelle.

First Class:
Ralph Lauren:have some simple pieces such as good navy track pants with a white trim in $199, white singlets with a red trim $129 and very classic navy pants $299. Evelyn Miles: Have a new label called ‘Walk with Walk” and there are elastized straps mules in bright colours $598 and some cute kitten heels mules $698. The Corner Shop haven’t seen it but the Balenciaga has just arrived in there yesterday! YSL is closing down in Australia Boo hoo! But the good news is there is still things left on sale but all the bags have gone apart from a black woven one for $695. Damn.There is a fab cream or pink satin jacket for $1550 from $5000, check out the pink and red toned top $440, the gold T shirts $560 and a purple twisted top in jersey $525. And looks like all the shoes have gone too. RIP. Coach:They are looking better and better. You will love some of the summer bags on sale in stripe canvas are 50% off. Check out the Hamptons totes in canvas with a stripe handles small $225,med $290 and large $375 ( very similar to the Hermes ones for $$$).The winter pieces are great: you want the buckle hobo bag in camel suede $645 and the Soho satchel in tan $690 and I do like the ‘top handle’ very lady like bags in black ,green and brown $585. Belinda MLC:They have the Sara Thom collection in and it is outrageously expensive! $4000 for a dress. ooh lala! Bring out the black Amex. They are all one offs and made from vintage fabrics and hand stitched that’s why it’s so outrageous. But you may find some tops for $1200 ish. They are all very boho looking as opposed to the Martin Grant’s collection which is exquisitely cut and looks very chic. And lets face Lee Razdiwill loves him and what’s good enough for Jackie O’s sister is good enough for moi. I want his goldish coat $2570. Plus the Lanvin is divine too. New in is some jewellery, very reasonably priced earrings for $40. Outrageous! They are very vintage looking paste bracelets, earrings and necklaces too from New York. You want the Anya Hindmarsh handbags for $1600 and there is fab Marc Jacobs light green bag for $1700. Also Checkout the Ann Demeulemeester T shirts $235 and the gorgeous knitwear from Antipasti and Matilda about $826.

Spiced Coconut, Chickpeas and Lamb

Here is an absolutely delicious and quick de la quick dinner you can whip up for the Olympics. It’s so easy: it takes no training, no practise and you won’t even be puffing. Plus you’ll win a medal when you serve this up.
Yummy, Yummy, Yummy.

You need for 4:

Lamb fillets x 2 or more
1 tabs olive oil
2 Garlics or more if you desire.
3cm or a chunk of grated ginger
1 to 3 small red chillie finely chopped
2 teasp of mustard seeds
6 curry leaves
¾ cup shredded coconut
1 teasp of brown sugar
400g can of chickpeas

Basmati rice if you feel like making it

·This is pretty quick so give the lamb a good grilling first, find out what it did last night and who it’s been seeing.
·Cook to your liking
·Then let it rest . It will need to after that
·You might pop on the rice now, too, using the snazzy absorption method.
·Give yourself a nice gin and tonic
·Look out for any drug cheats.
·Heat up the oil in a saucepan and add the garlic, ginger, mustard seeds, chillies, and curry leaves and give it a good stir for a couple of minutes. Now don’t be worried about the curry leaves.
·Add the coconut and sugar, and let it turn brown ish; toss and heat through.
Toss in the can of chickpeas and give it a good stir
·Oh yeh that’s looking fabulous.
·Test that it is positive and ready to eat.
·Now slice up the lamb into chic little slices. Well, it has been resting and now it’s ready for a marathon of eating.
·Serve the chickpeas with the lamb relaxing on top and a little bowl of rice
·Those curry leaves are pretty strong so feel free to fish them out before serving.
·And they can really stink out your spice cupboard so keep them in a screw top jar in the back of the cup board with the rest of those banned substances.
·Go for gold!

Coffee and Cigarettes by Jim Jarmusch
You can’t say this is a movie with a story because it is really a series of vignettes centred around coffee and cigarettes. (Funnily enough). But because these are almost banned substances these days, the whole movie is almost a politically incorrect statement. Oh my god, it is so shocking seeing so many smokers. Shot in black and white and apparently made over 17 years (though all the actors don’t look any younger), it stars lots of famous types playing themselves or a version of themselves. Some are really boring, some are really funny and some are just plain kooky. The fabulous Cate Blanchett plays herself as a movie star and then her rough Aussie cousin. She steals the show and it’s very funny. But watch out for Iggy Pop, Tom Waits, Alfred Molina, Steve Coogan, Jack white and the charmingly cynical Bill Murray who plays a waiter. The New York Yimes say that ‘Steve Coogan’s self-mocking turn is a repellent tour de force” I think that’s a compliment. Each little conversation/vignette is set in a café and it should be a relaxing atmosphere but most of the conversations are quite nervous, prickly, on edge and no one seems very happy . Maybe they should give up coffee and cigarettes.