“In a spiritual sense, we’re married… I believe you also marry in your heart and that means much more than a piece of paper.” Britney on not being legally married (so spiritual)
“This was such a spiritual connection for us… No piece of paper can capture what I feel.” Her husband ( except that piece of paper called The Prenuptial was signed).Captured?
“When you are in love and you know that then you should go for it. I was into too much before and now Kevin is just one of those people that makes me go ‘Huh’” Britney (huh? That’s it? Huh?)
“I don’t know why the media has picked Britney to be the current celebrity they most love to hate, but they have” Britney’s mother (huh? I can give you a million trashy reasons)
“I realise now that it’s no more dangerous to be here than in New York,” Madonna on being in Israel ( so dangerous with bombs going off in New York every week)
“If you observe (Bush), it’s quite amusing. If you listen to him as he speaks, if you follow him closely, it would provide you a great many laughs. ” Woody Allen on dubya ( laugh did we laugh).
“They misunderestimated me.” Dubya ( huh?)
“He got up to speak and the women went crazy applauding before the first words got out of his mouth. He only said a sentence or two. It was about how you should question everything in your life.” On Guy Ritchie trying to make a speech in Israel (questioning his prenup?)
“No sooner had he stepped off their private jet in his quest for serenity than Ritchie was heard calling the paparazzi “f–ers.” UK SUN (huh? Spiritual)
“What’s The Wall Street Journal? Is that good?” Paris Hilton when her co-author on “Confessions of an Heiress,” congratulated her on reaching No. 5 on The Wall Street Journal’s best-seller list (Huh?)
“I still say stupid things with brown hair, too.” Reese Witherspoon ( so does Britney, Madonna, Dubya and Paris) ( dumber and dumber)
“I’ve had so many stalkers: Funny stalkers, scary stalkers, every kind of stalker. One woman turned up at my place every day for about two weeks and just left different pairs of underpants for me in the mailbox. Luckily, they were always brand new.” David Beckham (lucky!)
‘George not included’ the catch phrase of the Fiat TV commercial filmed on Lake Como which sees George Clooney being enticed into the latest Fiat model by a beautiful woman who then drives him away. (not lucky)
“I’m just an accessory,” Brad Pitt at the Emmys ( a man bag, or clutch?)

Be afraid, be very afraid. Summer is coming and there is no choice, no going back. It’s time to throw on shorts, mini skirts, cute tops and sexy dresses. One problem. Are those croissants and donuts still sticking out from your hips? Mmm better get some scales, but don’t weigh yourself, weigh your food. Rush in to Myer now to get the fabulous Soehnle ‘Food Control Digital Scales’ which “weighs, calculates, and stores the kilocalories, kilojoules, carbohydrate, fat, protein - exchange of over 400 foods”. And we love the name: ‘Food Control’. The best news? It’s on sale from $239 to an outrageous $84.

Soehnle Food Control Digital Scale from Myer 9238 9111.

Who doesn’t rummage around the bottom of their big black hole (commonly known as a bag) always searching in a panic for their makeup bag? Relax! Now you can always find your bag of makeup tricks. Lash out on the gorgeous Stephane Marais makeup purse in a fabulous pink Pucci print ( designed in conjunction with Christian Lacroix at Pucci ). They are a limited edition and the chicest thing to whip out in an emergency…when you need to redo the lip gloss.
Stephane Marais Pucci makeup bag $350 from Mecca Cosmetica

I discovered this from a friend who looked absolutlely fabulolus straight after having work. And I mean dentist work. How could anyone look so healthy after having hours of panful surgery? Easy with the Nars Bronzer you suddenly look healthy and sun kissed. It looks great over foundation and gives your skin a fab glow. Sure its $70 but it’s cheaper than a holiday in Tahiti (or having work).

$70 Nars Laguna Bronzing Powder from Mecca Cosmetica.

New York fashion week is over and London fashion week is on: Although some of this city’s best-known names have dropped off the calendar, Paul Smith, Nicole Farhi, Frost French and Emma Cook showed collections blooming with color, a riot of flower prints and wild patterns. WWD
Annabel’s, the private London club that’s seen everyone who’s anyone glide through its doors, has launched Annabel’s, the magazine, featuring a mix of fashion and lifestyle stories. Contributors include Annabel , Nicholas Coleridge, who enthuses about London’s Bath and Racquets club, and stylist Charlotte Stockdale, who writes of her love of Chanell. The 110-page magazine was sent free to club members, and there are plans to publish it twice a year, wwd.
Fashionistas can finally have their Jimmy Choos — and eat them, too. The Berkeley hotel has introduced Pret-a-Porter, afternoon tea with runway-inspired goodies, including hot-pink cookies in the shape of an Oscar de la Renta dress, tiny éclairs with Missoni stripes, an Anya Hindmarch chocolate Pandora handbag and a gingerbread Jimmy Choo boot. “It started when Nicole Kidman and Renée Zellweger were staying at the hotel, and we sent up dress-shaped cookies to their rooms,” said Paula Fitzherbertm, p.r. director of the hotel. Wwd
Vivienne Westwood and Sex Pistols creator Malcolm McLaren, one of fashion’s most influential couples, will be reunited later this week — in an exhibition, that is. “Punk: A True and Dirty Tale,” which opens at The Hospital in London’s Covent Garden on Thursday, will trace the most significant points in punk rock’s history. Items from SEX and Seditionaries, the shops owned by Westwood and McLaren, will be on display at the multimedia venue and exhibition space opened by Dave Stewart of Eurythmics and Microsoft co-founder Paul Allen.wwd
The German billionaire Friedrich Christian “Mick” Flick will celebrate his 60th birthday on Tuesday and another Flick milestone: The opening of the Friedrich Christian Flick collection of contemporary art. After considerable controversy and political debate, Flick’s extensive art collection will finally have a home of its own here in the newly renovated Rieck Halls of the Hamburger Bahnhof Museum of Contemporary Art. At least for the next seven years, the collection — which one art world insider described as “one masterpiece after the other” — will be shown to the public in a rotating series of seven annual exhibitions. The collection includes the largest group of works by Bruce Nauman, as well as key paintings, sculptures, photographs, videos and installations by 150 European and North American artists such as Marcel Broodthaers, Marcel Duchamp, Peter Fischli and Cindy Sherman.
Located next to Gianfranco Ferré’s showroom in Brera, Clan Café is the latest Milan bar to court the cool crowd. Part-owned by Christian Vieri, an Italian soccer star who plays for Inter Milan, the Clan boasts all the right ingredients: First, there’s no drinks menu because the bartenders stir up beverages based on a customer’s favorite flavors. Then there’s the moody lighting that illuminates the bottles and glasses behind the bar, softened further by the latest house and lounge music that floods the space, with its curved lounge chairs, and filters out to the street — where many of the hip thirtysomethings congregate.wwd
Karl Lagerfeld for H&M line was launched at the Pompidou Centre in Paris

http://gfm.smh.com.au
Love to eat? Is the Pope catholic? Yes! Finally Good Food Month has arrived. So to make life simple, log on here and click on the calender for each day’s events! Easy. “ Whether it’s the Night Noodle Markets in the Botanic Gardens, a Spring Picnic in Centennial Park or international short films and cuisine beneath the stars at Sydney Olympic Park, Good Food Month celebrates the best our city has to offer.” Yum

http://www.flavorpill.com/
Off traveling again? Then here is another great website to give you a more detailed rundown on groovy cultural happenings in New York, London, LA, Chicago and San Francisco. “Find out what’s on for the following week for the best in music, art, theatre, film, DJ sets, readings and “every other cultural medium imaginable” Handy ! Also check out their link to the website http://www.boldtype.com with lots of info on the latest books but the fashion report site http://www.jcreport.com is very boring (but allow me to read it for you every week and pick out the news that matters!).

Britney Spears got hitched to Kevin Federline in a secret ceremony in LA, but Us weekly sayit was a fake and she is really getting married on oct 16.( fake)
Laura Baily, the model, is pregnant to movie mogul Eric Fellner.
Bruce Oldfield, the designer launched his autobiography “Rootless,” ( sell well in Australia)
A Judge has ordered Martha Stewart to report for prison by Oct. 8.
Danish Prince Joachim and his wife Princess Alexandra have separated and plan to divorce.
Josh Hartnett is going out with model Daria Werbowy, of the Gucci ads.
Justin Timberlake called off his wedding to Cameron because he needed time to convince his mother he was ready for marriage ( spiritual).
Harrison Ford stunned onlookers in Barcelona when he attempted to dump Calista Flockhart in a bin as they engaged in the high jinx as they made their way back to their hotel. ( Ford Dumps Flockhart) high jinx! imdb
Salma Hayek and Josh Lucas have gone their separate ways (dumped)
Kate Moss and Johnny Knoxville were partying at Bungalow 8 then ducked out hand in hand at 3 a.m.( ducked out for high jinx)
Kate Moss and Jack Nicholson left Spice Island restaurant together in New York ( Viagra high Jinx)
Liz Hurley is not pregnant.
Hugh Grant has gone ring shopping with Jemima Khan.
Paris Hilton confused the Williams sisters at the Tommy Hilfiger show when she asked them how many minutes apart they had been born. UK Vogue ( dumber and dumber)
Fergie has reportedly signed up to appear in the new series of I’m A Celebrity… Get Me Out of Here. ( just get her out.Please)
Prince Pavlos of Greece and his wife Marie-Chantal have had their fourth child
Donald Trump is talking to the Estée Lauder about doing a men’s fragrance (the smell of money)
Gwyneth Paltrow is to be paid $4 million for a day’s work when she appears in Every Word is True. She will play Peggy Lee in the film about Truman Capote’s life and has agreed to record a three-minute song.
Macaulay Culkin has thrown in jail on suspicion of possessing illegal substances.
“Mr. Pig,” the beloved Jack Russell terrier of milliner Philip Treacy has died. “Mr. Pig had no idea he was a dog. He acted like he owned me, and the shop was his. He led the most glamorous life. He was photographed by Bruce Weber and Mario Testino, and he’s been on catwalks with Naomi Campbell and Honor Fraser — and he’s even got a fan club in Japan.” Wwd

The Family: The Real Story of the Bush Dynasty by Kitty Kelley
How can you resist a book by Kitty Kelly on the man we all love to hate: George Dubya and the Bush family? Full of gossip and scandal! “Kitty Kelley, author of highly unflattering biographies of Jackie Onassis and the British royal family, has never received much cooperation from her subjects. Likewise, none was given for this one and it’s not hard to understand why.” She writes that Dubya snorted cocaine at Camp David while his father was president, and details the rise to power of Bush Snr “Those seeking a salacious peak at the inner sanctum of a wealthy and powerful family will not be disappointed –Kelley always delivers on that count–and will likely devour allegations of Barbara Bush’s sour temperament, George H.W. Bush’s long-standing affair with aide Jennifer Fitzgerald, and George W. Bush’s obnoxious drunken frat boy days that stretched, according to Kelley, well into adulthood. Fantastic!
$49 from Dymocks

The Christmas list:
A.L.T. 365+ by Andre Leon
“Armed with only his single use Kodak camera and his witty way with words, US Vogue’s 6ft 7 black Editor at large Andre Leon Talley, shoots and tells his way through 12 months of people, places and parties; each more stylish than the last” says UK Vogue. Designed by world-renowned art director Sam Shahid, “it is a wonderful and warm ‘family’ album that was inspired by Allure, the iconic volume of culture and style by Talley’s mentor, Diana Vreeland. Unvarnished, unairbrushed, and full of love, A.L.T. 365+ reveals a world where style is as style does.” I want it now! ( but it’s not out till November 1.)
$57 from www.amazon.com

Economy:
Ojay: have a quite nice black hat with feathers for the races $89 and some cheap but chic but cheap suits too. Portmans: have done a black satin cami with silver trim and frayed chiffon edge $99, and there are some quite good big sunglasses in here $29. Dotti: have a version of the famous yellow dress that was worn by Kate Moss, very 50’s in a net fabric (don’t stand close to the heater!) in lots of colours $129 and they have some fake leather, big zip through, sausage slouch bags in mint, salmon and black $29. QBF: As I keep reporting each week, QBF is amazing with lots of fake designer bags in fake leather, some on sale, and there are heaps of cute printed 50’s skirts too and outrageous 80’s shoes….its so packed in here, it is just too hard to list it all. Sportsgirl: It’s very pastel and very eighties and very scary to anyone over 30. It is sequins beaded and drape heaven. Check out the sequin scarf in cream again, the beach bags in nylon net in pink or green $19 with a cute flower, the flat T bar thin strap sandles $59 in a bronze pink, the brown tweed fedora on sale for $19, and the long shoe string strap singlets $24.There is cute marrimekko style floral pink and orange print skirt $129, denim mini miniskirts $89, and Jimmy Choo esque heels with lacing up the leg in mint suede $89, and ¾ crop black pants $69. Country Road: have started a sale already with about 30% off. There is the cute green knit rib top I had my eye on now $79, nice round neck, rib knit, long sleeves tops $79 in choc brown and cream, and there are some messenger leather bags in red that look cool. Also the green car coat/trench coats are now $200 and the knit black pencil skirts a la Azzedine are now $89 too. Check out the cool caramel chiffon wrap dress with a pink squiggle pattern! $249. Nine West: have some Pierre Hardy inspired net shoes, very 50’s lady like with bows and flat and pointy $119. Witchery: have a black wrap cotton skirt with a buckle, good basic in summer with a white tank $149. Cue: have gone very Balenciaga (shall we say 2 seasons ago) with jersey drape and wrap tops with pleather trim $129 and a ruffle dress $189 in black or choc. There is a black bat wing top with cut out shoulders $169, and don’t forget the very good heavy (read not clingy) tank top $39. David Lawrence: have some fab bags in at great prices. There is a caramel or mint green one with 2 handles, structured shape, very square for $169 and a fab black barrel ish bag with the obligatory silver buckles, eyelets and pockets $169 too. And don’t forget the dark denim flared skirt $159 as a good summer basic. Just Jeans: have basic cotton plain muslin skirts in basic colours $69 and a white cotton halter top $35 and cute pull on stripe cotton hats $9.95, and the canvas cotton Marc Jacobs style peacoats are $69. Climax: Has done a cheapo version of a Birkin in pleather: one in cream and choc, and also one red and white, and camel or choc for $59! And also have lots of cheap floral sundresses and skirts. Dangerfield: Have some very funky accessories: Straw cowboy hats (yes almost a classic now) in different colours $29 in cream, black, white, pink, red maybe even green! Also lots of cuffs in all sorts of styles, in red punched leather $10,wire ones or fab enamel thin ones in groups of colours for about $10.There are some good cheap pleather bucket bags (that look almost leather) with a long strap in salmon, blue and yellow $34 and check out the huge range of slogan rocknroll T shirts $48 ( ‘When I grow up I want to be a band mole”) with Blondie T shirts, ACDC T shirts, Jets ,etc.Also check out the cool aviators from Reality for about $40, and other styles for about $29 in colours as well. Queenspark: The chic red and white stripe, stretchy camisoles in here caught my eye with a little lace trim – also in black and white $79. FCUK: have some cool jeans with crease down the front $140 and don’t forget to get the pink and red marimekko style print skirts $140, the handy, black over the knee side pocket pants $89 and the batwing simple T shirts in black and white $69.

Business
A/X Armani Exchange: Check out the sexy black Azzedine style knit sheath dress ( very mini) with panels and stitching $219, and the stone zip through tight bomber jacket $229, and the narrow black trousers $189 are cool. There is a black T with cut out shoulders $69, a white singlets over long sleeve T $99, and a handy black stretch denim pencil skirt $129. There is a cool pull on hat in white or black leather $119 and a few handy white shirts. Pierucci: are good for work wear suiting. But checkout their double cuffed white rap shirt $195, the Pucci print chiffon swirl in pinks and aqua skirt $360 and same fabric sexy backless halter neck dress $585. There is a nice cotton peacoat with big shiny buttons ,for you in black satin or watermelon $595 or a cute little dress for the races in black with a tiny diamante stone belt $545, and a good shirtwaister dress in shiny silver satin $450.Check out the serious beaded and jeweled evening dresses, from $895, and very nice basic black knit T cashmere $225. Bettina Liano: must be made for stick insects under 16 but there are some roman sandles in fake snakeskin with a silver rings at the front $325. Leona Edmiston: has a print grey and white leaf print 40’s dress $525, a wrap jersey batwing dress with a few little tiny jewels ( you guessed it!) on the front, in jade and black $540. Zambelli Donna: Have some great knits for work, and even if you don’t. Check out the Chanel style trim round neck cardigans: there is brown with pink trim, blue with light blue trim and caramel with light blue trim $109, a short sleeve knit T $89, and a knit polo shirt with a tiny collar $89. They have great shirts here; Check out the double cuff stripe shirt for $149 in blue and white, or pink, and a very lovely shirt, soft cotton with the chicest double cuff $170. There is a great suit jacket (great cut/quality) $495, lovely side pocket pants $259 and a very nice black satin cami with lace trim $175. Karen Millen: has done a peacock, Mathew Williamson style dress in chiffon $370 with a camel back ground and the same print in a skirt, there is a cute chiffon ruffle cami $280 and black knit cami with a rib $205.Check out the heels with lacing up leg and a leather flower trim in black and red $270 and a good Pucci print style skirt $379 in pinks or blues.

First Class:
Coach: Have some new bags, very inspired by Prada and Gucci. Check out the
Hamptons satchel, a square leather structured bag in green or camel $610 or the Hamptons Hobo which comes in different colours and suedes and leather and is a slouch shape with big buckle at the front $ 625. Or there is the Hamptons carry all ( and it is) a bigger bag with 2 handles a bit Birkin ish in camel or black $690. There is a stripe small duffle similar to Gucci with a logo print and then a big suede stripe from top to bottom $595 and I like the cute pull on nylon hat in black $200. Check out the handy wallets (almost clutch bag size) in all sorts of colours and suedes $415 and their charms or dingle dangles to pop on your bag or use as keyrings $80. I love the gorgeous cashmere wool stripe fringed scarves in pinks and reds or blues and greens $415. Max Mara: Lots of new summer pieces here. You want the gorgeous black long peacoat with white stitching, the Sportmax vertical black and white stripe T $310, the black and white spot halter chiffon top $355 and the Sportmax knit, black V neck cardigan $455. There is the perfect simple, stone, belted trench coat $1225, a shorter version $995, a black jersey T Shirt $200, a good classic ¾ chinos $345, and a chic little wrap black skirt with a net trim $845. Check out the gorgeous knit rib shell top $495 and the jersey, twisty tie neck, slinky black tops $300 ish ( yes lots of black here) and the sheer jersey knit trim top $770, or the black lace dress $1600 and the marrimekko style print skirt $460. There is a light blue ,cream or black shell top $150, and a handy black very light zip through bomber $540 and a light blue zip through chunky knit tight cardigan $560.Also a sheer navy and white T $255 and a navy and cream knit racer back T $335 and simple T shirts in lots of colours $100. Robbie ingham: Is on sale and the next season A/W pieces are coming in a couple of weeks. Check out 30% off Chloe such as the white beaded bags now $1327, and the Paul Smith is 30% off too. You might like the feather print T shirt $137 or the stripe mini clutches. There is 30% off Victor & Rolf such as the black trousers now $455 plus black twisty tops $300. CP Company is great here ! Simple great fabrics and a bit of a fashion edge to basics instead of the usual yawn. You want the cute zip, cream, sporty knit top $600, the navy T shirt, ribbed $98, the T shirt white and ribbed for $125 and a heavy jersey shell top to hide bulges $198. There is a cute little cap sleeve, stretchy T $125. Check out the funky ‘bleach’ T shirts $189 and the men’s T shirts are great with all sorts of silly things on the front $159. Also check out Belinda in MLC with the windows full of the amazing collection by Sarina Suriano : tops made entirely of jewels and beads. Divine.

Aparagus and ricotta tarts

Spring is in the air and it’s time for picnics in the parks with tarts. In that order. But perhps don’t use your new ‘food control scales’ until after you’ve eaten this.
You can make these small or just go for one big one.

You need;
2 bunches of asparagus
1 cup of fresh ricotta
1 egg whisked
½ cup cream
1 packet of delightfully slimming butter puff pastry or Filo pastry

·Preheat the oven to about 180
·Steam the asparagus and keep them long and sexy
·Keep them tender and throw them in cold water to keep their gorgepus green colour ( the colour du jour for summer) and let them cool down.
·Combine the naughty cream, egg and ricotta so it’s a lovely smooth goo
·Moisterize a baking tray or tart tray with lots of butter
·Line the tray with the pastry. If you are using frozen pastry let it defrost a little. If it gets too floppy its too tricky to handle. We hate floppy.
·Now spoon in the ricotta gooey mix into the pastry so it look lovely and evenly spread.
·Drain the asparagus stems and then line them up on top of the ricotta so they are in chic little rows or go crazy and do your own pattern.
·Now whack it into the oven and cook for about 15 to 20 minutes until the pastry is crisp and golden.
·To serve, drizzle a bit of olive oil over so it looks good
·Easy as a picnic!

Somersault … written and directed by Cate Shortland
This movie is so very wistful, moody and sexy and ‘visually haunting’ it should have been French. With all the fleeting meaningful glances and long silences, it really has a European sensibility. But of course, if it was French you might think it was another pretentious arty movie. Mais non! I loved this movie. The photography was stunning and reminded me very much of ‘My Life without Me’ with the same groovy look and feel, and incredibly beautiful shots. Maybe Somersault should be renamed ‘My life with Me in every frame kissing lots of boys” ! It’s about a young and very pretty 16 yr old girl, Heidi, who runs away from home (Canberra - well you would too, if you lived in Canberra) and catches a bus up to the snowy town of Jindabyne. She makes friends with a motel keeper, gets a job in the local service station and then desperate not to be alone, goes out to the pub and meets boys; lots of them. But Cate Shortland’s fantastic direction and writing makes no moral judgements and it is just “a depiction of a teenage girl racing as hard and as fast as she can through life, still a child at heart.” Thank god there is a love story (of sorts), when she meets a very handsome bloke who, like a typical Aussie farmer, doesn’t say much and can’t talk about feelings. Mmm did I say typical Aussie farmer? Make that typical Aussie. It is a mesmerizing film, and how lovely to see an Australian movie shot in the snow rather than the beach. It’s all about what lies beneath and what’s hiding beneath the surface. You can‘t wait for the snow to melt. A must see.