The FiFi Report 111
18 November 2005
issue 111

“The film is full of sexual imagery which is totally inappropriate to Austen’s novel. In one scene, a wild boar, which I assume is supposed to represent Darcy, wobbles through the farm with its sexual equipment on show.” The Jane Austen Society in North America on Pride and Predjudice. Wobbling equipment?.
“They can go jump in a lake.” director Joe Wright’s reply. ( with Mr.Darcy ).
“I don’t know why anyone would want to take coke now, it was different in my day, because it was all so much purer. Now these dealers mix it with salt, washing powders, anything they can get their hands on.” Rod Stewart on the good ol days when life was pure and sweet.
“We were at home. We didn’t do it at a hospital. We were at home privately, you know, intimately. And then I rushed down in the Ferrari with my handbag and the little vial next to it” Rod’s girlfriend on getting her hands on real pure cocaine? No, on Rod’s wobbling equipment.
“ It was nice that (my husband) didn’t have to show up at the clinic a half an hour earlier with a magazine and whatever else ” Brooke shields on conceiving naturally. (Whatever else does her husband need? Ask Rod).
“I had a fly in my hair. I was brushing it away. Someone asked me what was wrong and I said something like, ‘I have a frog on my head,’ joking. Then I read that I said I had a frog in my hair.” Joaquin Phoenix no flies on you.
“you realize this as you get older — you’re still the same person, but you’re older,” Oprah is getting older and brainier.
“And that is the same thing with money. I am the same person. I have just grown to be more of myself with better shoes.” Oprah has better shoes and surgery.
“I was not buying — not buying or not buying, That’s why I kept saying ‘you’re gone, you’re really gone.’’ Oprah on new shoes? No, Tom’s wobbling couch jumping .
“It’s a bit annoying, but I’m not worrying about things like that. I’m enjoying my time with Tom. It would be nice if people were happy for us,” Katie Holmes is buying everything.You’re gone. gone

Sportsgirl Accessories

One word. One place to shop this week. Sportsgirl. It’s cheap but chic heaven especially in the accessory department. Buy the floppy 70’s straw sunhat in white or choc brown for $19; the amazing Miu Miu-esque jewelled, stone encrusted choc brown slides $79; the fabulous Marni style beads in every colour and every shape $19 or try the printed silk retro vintage headscarves for $19. One hint: ignore all the boho geek. Spend up big here and you’ll have dollars left over to spend at the Belinda sale.

Tiffany & Co crystal square candlesticks

Christmas Beauty rule #1: everyone looks better in candlelight.
Christmas Beauty rule #2: Everyone looks better with Geroge Clooney
Christmas Beauty rule #3: Everyone looks better when they party in gorgeous candlelight thrown off by the Tiffany & Co crystal, chunky, square cut candlesticks. A groovier alternative to a chandelier these crystal candlesticks are the item du jour and all you need to set the mood for a sensational party.
Christmas Beauty rule #4: Everyone looks better after shopping in Tiffany with Geroge Clooney.
$90 Tiffany & Co crystal square candlesticks from http://www.tiffany.com

Nivea Sun Self Tan Lotion

It’s an emergency: I see something white and bright and big. So scary children and animals are fleeing in horror, covering their eyes in shock. But there is no escape for me. Big, white and bright is attached to my manolos. They are my legs. But then I find the emergency exit. It’s the Nivea sun self tan lotion. I love it. It smells good, it dries quickly, the colour is natural, it rubs in easily and it doesn’t flake off. Plus it has a moisturising, light formula with Vitamin E and Macadamia Nut Oil. All for under $20. What more do you want? Lipo suction.

$18 Sun Self Tan Lotion from chemists and major department stores.

issue 111

Gap inc has opened a new store/label in New York aimed at 35 yr olds called Forth and Towne http://www.forthandtowne.com/index.html
The hot movie? Transamerica; ‘Felicity Huffman plays a perfectly adjusted transsexual woman about to undergo the final surgery to become a woman who finds out she has a son http://www.transamerica-movie.com/
Gisele Bündchen has been tapped for the next campaign for Louis Vuitton. Mert Alas and Marcus Piggot, are said to have photographed her in Ibiza, Spain.
Author Candace Bushnell has agreed to a deal to turn her latest novel, Lipstick Jungle, into a TV series.
The Peacock at Rowsley is a small luxury hotel in the English Midlands http://www.thepeacockatrowsley.com/ recently acquired by Lord Edward Manners, owner of nearby Haddon Hall, the hotel has been refurbished and styled by award winning designer India Mahdavi. Check out the Haddon Hall in http://www.haddonhall.co.uk/ seen in the latest Pride and Prejudice movie.
Matthew Bourne’s dance piece based on the Tim Burton classic Edward Scissorhands will premiere at Plymouth’s Theatre Royal from November 14-19th in a trial run before moving to London’s Sadler’s Wells on November 22nd.
Want to see something nice everyday? go to http://www.thedailynice.com
Looking for fabulous contemporary art? Head to Counter Editions in London for prints and Tmultiples by artist such as tracey Emin, Gary Hume, Sam Taylor Ward, and Juergen Teller http://www.countereditions.com
Off to Spain? Don’t forget the groovy Hotel Omm http://www.hotelomm.es/
Time to head to the Caribbean and stay here at http://www.ladera.com. ‘In a surprise double victory, Condé Nast Traveler readers have voted Ladera not only the “Best Hotel in the Caribbean,” but they also gave it the highest score of any hotel in the world, ranking it the “Best of the Best” in the overall hotel category. Sydney was voted best city in the world AGAIN. Of course.

www.firebox.com

http://www.firebox.com
‘The world is full of boring products. We search high and low for things with a twist. Products that are inspirational, quirky, bizarre and downright fun. From Las Vegas to Los Alamos, Tokyo to Tashkent, we scour the world looking for the ‘next big thing’, then make it available through our award-winning website, mail order catalogue and select high street partners. It is our mission to always be first with the latest hot stuff” cool

http://www.worth1000.com/cache/gallery/contestcache.asp?contest_id=7923&display=photoshop
Go here to see celebs with their retouching removed…shocking!

issue 111

Britney Spears’ husband K. Fed has broken his hand - after spinning out of control on the dance floor.
Dad Pitt and Angelina Jolie went supermarket shopping. Shocking.
Katie Holmes managed to get away from Tom Cruise for 15 minutes to do some shoe shopping. outrageous.
Britney Spears went braless to a Malibu animal hospital. Titillating.
Paris Hilton was seen in the streets of LA barefoot. What the?
Nicole Kidman has been seen wearing a ring on her wedding finger while walking through a US street with Keith Urban. it’s a sign.
Jude Law and Sienna Miller are back together again. And now they’re not. And are. And not. And are!
Jessica Simpson was seen driving.
Tara Reid had her 30th birthday party and went wild “swinging her hair back and forth and the crowd was really getting into it” Wild swinging her hair? You crazy thing.
Halle Berry is the new face of Versace.
Angelina Jolies estranged father Jon Voight has found love with Diana Ross.
Madonna has promised to sing live and without any background vocalists at the Koko club tonight to silence accusations that she lip-synchs. Watching Madonna try to do a headstand on stage while kicking her legs and holding a note should be great fun for the whole family’ The Superficial .
Leonardo DiCaprio and Kirsten Dunst were spotted canoodling in public.
‘Orlando Bloom’s former management company is suing him for failing to pay $660,000 in commission. I guess when you spend all your money on goatee grooming products it gets pretty hard to pay the bills’ The Superficial.com
Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie have signed a pre-nup.
Paris Hilton and Stavros Niarchos started a fight at Kelly Osbourne’s 21st birthday bash at the Hard Rock Hotel in Las Vegas.
Gisele Bunchen is now rumoured to be dating surfer Kelly Slater.
Michael Jackson has been caught in the ladies toilets in Dubai - applying make-up. Caught.


Julie and Julia : 365 Days, 524 Recipes, 1 Tiny Apartment Kitchen by Julie Powell
This is another foodie book (not a lesbian love story!) and it sounds hilarious. “ In her adolescence, Powell came across Joy of Sex and Mastering the Art of French Cooking by Julia Child and forever linked the two in her mind, finding something sensual about cooking. Years later, living in New York with her husband and bored in her secretary job she decides to start cooking Julia Childs’ 524 recipes in one year and chronicling the experience on a blog. The tougher the shopping and cooking assignment, the more sensual the experience, as Powell discovers incredible determination and hidden talents in cooking, writing, and living. This is a joyful, humorous account of one woman’s efforts to find meaning in her life.” Bon appetit.
$16 http://www.amazon.com Publisher: Little, Brown (September 28, 2005)

The Christmas LIst:
Lee Miller : A Life (Hardcover) by Carolyn Burke
This is a sensational story of an amazing woman. ‘Lee Miller (1907–1977) began her career as a fashion model discovered when Conde Nast nearly ran her over. She went to Paris and became Man Ray’s muse and student. Her surrealist background led to her taking stunning photos of the London Blitz, but she shot her most memorable—and disturbing—images accompanying American troops from Paris to Dachau as a war correspondent for Vogue. .As the first major biographer outside the Miller family, Burke traces a dynamic life that embodies the spirit of the 20th century’s first half’. A must read.
$35 http://www.amazon.com/ Publisher: Knopf (November 15, 2005)

issue 111

Hippy, boho chic, skanky anything is over, over, over. I never want to see any of it again. Black and Minimalism looks so appealing and modern. I refuse to mention a tiered skirt ever again. And you may wear only the tiered sundress on the beach holiday.
Economy:
K Mart: They have a fabulous copy of a thin stripe Missoni scarf in rich colours; how can you resist for $19? Also check out the cute little loose tanks, with plaited straps, very Chloe $19. Veronika Maine: Check out the sale rack for grey chinos now $79; the black goddess, ruched top now $104; a black chiffon ruffle front blouse (the cut is a bit mingy and small), $145; and a black chiffon evening dress with satin trim now $174. Also new in; the black purple chiffon s/s V neck shirt $145; the tie dye black/ rust cream dress, ruched with a ribbon belt $365 and a black ruched dress with a grosgrain ribbon belt $359. David Lawrence: check out the black, chiffon capelet $159; the white sailor pants $139; the plaited bronze sandals ; the khaki military jacket $159; the single breasted trench is handy in stone or black $259; and I like the choc brown bucket bag. Buy the bronze silk cami $89; the leather toe thong $79 and the Prada style black slouch eyelet bag $169.Kookai: love the new tall, black Balenciaga style tote; it’s the new hot bag (not the Lariat) $$cheap; the bronze wedges $89 and the cool jewellery and beads. There is a black military jacket now reduced to $129.Review: check out the cute sundress in the Cacherel red and white graphic print with huge blue leaves $199; and the halterneck top version $159. Also there is a cute marc Jacobs style 40’s red chiffon blouse with puff short sleeves $159.Witchery: They have the same dress that I see Esprit has, um, designed; it’s tiered and with a broderie anglaise insert with a drawstring $79; good for the beach in black or white. Also in a halter version. Check out the paisley navy and cream cotton top $99; the blackl chiffon v neck tank with bronze beading $119; the light blue printed tiered sundress $169 and the Indian toe thongs with studs $49 in silver. There is wedge tan heels with a rope trim $129 and re cool racer back grey tanks $24; and great sweatpants $59;FCUK: nothing new to buy. I see watermelon. Sportsgirl: There are some fab things in this week see cheap but chic: Check out the pink paisley Indian print empire dress $59; the cute lruched little white sundress $99; the frilly purple or black muslin loose Victorian bustier top $69; the fabulous tanks in silver grey or black, cut with an empire with a baggy turned under hem $49; the denim shorts $59. There are grey marle halter tops with a diamante brooch $69; a fab sheer red and pink paisley Kaftan top $99 with a drawstring front; and the tan open toe heels are on sale $59. Check out the Cacherel copy skirt now on sale $49; the military jacket in cotton denim and white now $59; Sussan: Has had a bit a makeover.Check out the very Balenciage print graphic red/white check chiffon wrap top $69; but it has an asymmetrical hem you need to cut off; the black pintucked cotton cami $49 in linen; the navy and white double layer singlet $39 and the really nice chiffon green caftan top $79. Cue: Love the wide choc tan belt $85; the fab black chiffon patch pocket shirt $225; the bagg,y baggy white pants $145; the 40’s, frill, cap sleeve, black dress $335; the round neck, black, 40’s belted top $165; and a graphic retro print tulip skirt in faded mustard and brown $228.Check out the navy sheer chiffon pleated dress with white insert waist $255 and the orange Hermes Birkin bag is a very good inspired copy $230.Diva: Love the jewellery here; so cheap, so chic. Check out the multi coloured strand beads $19; the black beads on black string $29 and the round wooden disc on leather thonging $9.95.Buy the big flat black beads on ribbon, a steal for $14. There are cute silver ball, charm bracelets $29 and silver baby pearls as a multi strands $29, Portmans: check out their skinny leg dark denim jeans $79 and the rather chic black and white zebra ish stripe chiffon caftan with a few beads $79.Speedo: love the new swimsuits here: check out the simple black halter long tankini $59 (with vava voom padding!), the fab cotton caftan tops $31; the cute brown and white stripe sailor’s drawstring bag; the halter eyelet one piece with plunging V neck $99, sexy minexy; and the matching bikini with eyelets and lacing. The red/white and black wetsuit style zip front tankini, is so very 60’s, it’s cool $85.

Business Class:
New Shop Alert! Model Gail Elliot has opened a store, Little Joe by Gail Elliot Boutique,Edgecliff Road, Woollahra (next to Sambag) www.LittleJoeNY.comCountry Road: on sale again: These are the original prices; Go for the pink and orange floral tie back sundress $159; the teal and grey stripe singlet $39; the white scoopneck, bias cut tunics $119.There is a lovely dark blue beaded caftan with black beads (or in white) with a fringed hem $139; good for the beach; a French blue halter dress in cotton, $199; a floral silk sundress $249; and a white sleeveless cotton voile cami $89.Buy the drape scoop white tank $59; the double layer shoestring tank $69; grey sateen shorts $129; the black drape gathered front dress $199; and the floppy sunhat $79.The chinos in grey are a great staple $129. Buy the fabulous wood platform mules in tan or red $179; the T bar flat sandals $99; the silk cami in choc or red $69, and of course the silk taffeta trench. Also check out the fab Christmas decorations from $5.95.CK Jeans: Check out the fab floral shoestring sundress with a padded bra (!) $299; also in plain white; a red knit tank $129; the V neck white tank $39 ; white cargo pants $229; the drawstring tank in floral cotton jersey $129; There is also cute white drawstring linen pants $149; silver grey rib, round neck sweater cotton knit $149; and white jeans $199. Lisa Ho: check out the batwing silk sleeve jersey dress in taupe $539; the beaded caftan in caramel with silver beads, very luxe $497; the white ¾ jeans $320; the black satin smoking jacket (ditch the daggy brooch button) $545; and the narrow, crop cotton pants, with studs on the side, also in khaki, very Chloe. Scanlan & Theodore: Buy it all. A divine collection; Best pieces would be the blanket stitched cotton sundress with a belt $400; the gorgeous wrap and tie print top $380 with orange flowers; the orange satin wrap halter top also in lots of colours.$300. Go for the long tie dye tank dress $120; the 40’s print dress $600 in blues and orange floral; a satin 40’s print chiffon blouse $400; dark denim boyfriend Capri pants $240; and a purple wrap satin dress with blue flowers $650. Check out the navy and white scoop neck tank $95; the gathered front paisley cotton jersey dress $600; the lime green strapless Sarah Jessica Parker dress $800 and the gorgeous black baggy shots with a belt $320. Love the red satin long cami with rosettes $250. Also buy the fab bags and the must have over size sunglasses by Dita as worn by Nicole Ritchie at al for about $300. Jigsaw: looked and searched but found zero in the groovy department: I see lilac and watermelon. What a pity Jigsaw used to have some cool but classic pieces. Max & CO: check out the white jacket $420; the white cotton Capri pants $240; the burgundy stripe top with a drawstring neck $240 and the green beaded Kaftan $270. There is a cute black chiffon ruffle sleeveless shirt $240; the grey tank with silver sequin trim is still there $240 and so is the divine black rib zip knit with silver studs $360 and the side pocket dark denim jeans $280. Check out the black shift dress in cotton with a frayed trim $320; the beautiful white rib sweater with silver buttons along the shoulder $295.

First Class;
Sale!!!!: Head to Belinda and The Corner Shop for all summer stock on sale with 30% to 50% off .Akira: Head to the Sample sale: level 1, 2-12 Foveaux st, Surry Hills, on today and tomorrow till 5 pm. Gucci: The Cruise and pre summer has arrived in store: It’s not the same Gucci as Tom Fords and I am very sad about that. There are still some fab things but it aint the same! Check out the horseshoe print brown satin shirt is OK $1170; divine classic taupe/gold pants $900; sexy bronze heels $700; the most divine navy peacoat with a belt you have ever seen $2640 and the horse bit black trousers $1350. There are hot pink tops; Gucci or not we don’t do pink. There are divine orange drawstring cotton caftan top $745; and a red jersey top with gold chain hardware $960. Also check out the fab stamped leather slouch bags in patent or matte; the fab big sunglasses and the divine heels in purple stamped leather $720. Buy the black patent open toe heels $725; the flat T bar sandals with a chain in the red and green signature colour $600; and the black patent heels with silver inserts $705. Louis Vuitton: The staff here are the so lovely and so knowledgeable about the whole collection. Bless. The divine winter collection is here and the summer will arrive in about a month. The craftsmanship takes your breath away; Buy the black mink bejeweled top $8000; the asymmetrical skirt in grey wool $1500 with avelvet trim ; the black taffeta jeweled encrusted tank $1500; the satin silk skirt in black with jewels and velvet trim $2500 and the beautiful white cardigan in a rib knit with silver buttons and belt $1500. There is a white leather bomber jacket $8000; fabulous jodhpur style pants $1100; the most fabulous dark denim jeans $745 and the black stamped leather bag $2200 ish . Buy the black patent square toe pumps $940, the amazing and much photographed peep toe satin heels with lace trim $900; the studded cotton canvas messenger bags in orange and pink and the red or the tan leather with gold stud flat sandals $650. There are gorgeous tan low heel square toe boots $1520; amazing square toe satin heels with a huge jewel front $1500; and little patent black slingbacks $1340. The patent platform square toe ankle straps are the coolest things you have ever seen $1150 and buy the Pharrel Williams sunglasses. Cool.

Lime and Lemongrass Chicken….

Lime and Lemongrass Chicken…. from Donna Hay Issue 23

How can you resist this fresh and healthy little salad? Ideal for lunch or as an entree for a dinner party. All you do is poach the chicken and then toss it in mint, chilli and Asian dressing and serve it in a lettuce leaf. It’s a model meal. Time needed? 5 minutes.

You need for 4:
I tab olive oil or peanut oil
4 chicken breasts
2 stalks lemongrass shredded
2 long red chillis
¼ cup mint
1 Cos lettuce for serving
¼ cup limejuice
2 teasp brown sugar optional
¼ cup fish sauce
2 more limes for accessorising

·There are 2 ways to cook up the chicken. You can either poach it with a bit of lemongrass in the water or
·Heat up the oil and cook the chicken breasts in a frying pan
·While they are cooking away slice up the lemon grass into little pieces.
·Slice up the chillies into long sexy strips.
·When the chicken has cooked, let it cool and then slice it up into chic little thin strips.
·Pour a wine or two
·Add the lemongrass to the pan or heat up some oil and cook it until it’s soft and smells fab.
·In a bowl toss in the mint, chicken, chilli and lemongrass and give it a good mix
·Pop into a bed of lettuce and then
·Mix fish sauce, sugar ( if on a diet; no, no, no, no sugar. Naughty ) and lime juice and give it as whisk
·Drizzle over chicken and serve with the accessorizing of limes or some sprigs of mint
Hint: men may require some kind of carbs to go with this so offer some boiled rice to keep them happy. Very Important.

issue 111

Kiss Kiss Bang Bang ……directed by Shane Black (creator of Lethal Weapon)
Who: Val Kilmer, Robert Downey Jr and Michelle Monaghan.
The Plot: A Smarty pants thriller. Petty criminal accidentally sits in on a casting for a cop movie and gets sent to LA. Meets up with gay cop (not from The Village People). A pretty girl turns up, people get shot, bodies turn up and I just lost the plot. They did too. Think Pulp fiction does China town. Charlie Chaplin meets the Doors.
Acting: Val Kilmer is wrong as a gay guy. I work in the fashion industry in Sydney; I should know. Robert Downey JR is cute, Michelle Monahan steals the show.
Photography: To no particular point other than paying homage where homage is due, the movie is divided into five chapters named after Raymond Chandler titles, beginning with “Trouble Is My Business” and concluding with “Farewell My Lovely. Cool.
Number of times the F word used: lost count
Toilet scene: of course; one in every movie
Wardrobe: Michelle Monaghan’s legs are her best accessory; short skirts and trench coats.
Smooches: yes, but not smokin’
Best review: “smart, hilarious blend of detective story and action film, relishing the viciously twisting plot and the chance to take sarcastic swipes at life in superficial Los Angeles.” BBC
Best worst review: “Vulgar, noisy, pointless and stupid.” NEW YORK OBSERVER
Car chases: A cop movie directed by the guy who wrote Lethal Weapon. Nuf said.
When Harry met Sally romance Richter scale: 6/10 Between dead bodies there are live ones.They fall in love.
Tom Cruise /Alien sighting? This movie is as confusing as War of the Worlds or Katie Holmes pregnancy. Tom Cruise as Gay Perry would be fun.
See it or donate to the Prada bag/save Katie fund :If you love a black comedy with murders galore see this or just Kiss Kiss Prada Prada.
http://kisskiss-bangbang.warnerbros.com/

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